


How to fall in love in 100 days

by Kytanna



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Christmas Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Dís and Dwalin only exist to annoy Thorin, Falling In Love, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Good Uncle Bilbo Baggins, Good Uncle Thorin, Grief/Mourning, Hugs, Idiots in Love, Kid Fic, Kid Fili, Kid Frodo, Kid Kili, Kissing, Light Angst, M/M, Meet-Cute, Mutual Pining, One Big Happy Family, Slow Burn (kinda), This fic is full of soft moments, Thorin and Bilbo are trying very hard to be best uncles, Thorin is a Softie, just a tiny bit, so much platonic kissing, you're gonna melt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:42:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 34,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26252848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kytanna/pseuds/Kytanna
Summary: As their lives intertwine, Thorin, Bilbo, and their nephews learn the meaning of finding a family, love and the hard path towards healing. All, over the course of a hundred days.
Relationships: Bilbo Baggins & Frodo Baggins, Bilbo Baggins & Fíli & Kíli, Bilbo Baggins & Thorin Oakenshield, Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield, Frodo Baggins & Thorin Oakenshield, Fíli & Kíli & Thorin Oakenshield
Comments: 31
Kudos: 146





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [navyfeather](https://archiveofourown.org/users/navyfeather/gifts).



> Happy Birthday Navy!!!!🥳🥳♥️😘
> 
> My sweet and beloved friend! I took your Xmas prompt and put as much winter fluff as I could, while still making sure to add enough drama to spice things up! 
> 
> This fic is really a giantic one-shot but I split it up in 5 parts to make the reading easier. I hope you like it! ♥️
> 
> A million thanks to @birdkeeperklink for proofreading this for me!! And also for being incredibly supportive and an absolute sweetheart throughout the whole process of me writing this. ♥️🤗
> 
> (Btw kudos to all the people that spot all the bnha references, I'm a nerd askldjklfjkr)

**Day 1**

Thorin called after Kíli, holding Fíli’s hand firmly so he wouldn’t try to escape like his rascal of a brother. Kíli had rushed to the ornaments stand, bent in buying a new one for their tree. Thorin still wasn’t sure how they had managed to find a Christmas market when November had barely begun, but again, Christmas seemed to start a little bit earlier as the years went by. 

“Kíli! Wait!” Thorin yelled as his nephew turned a corner and Thorin lost sight of him. He walked faster, Fíli hot at his heels, also calling out for his brother to wait for them.

Just as there were about to catch up with him Thorin suddenly bumped into someone. From the corner of his eye, he noticed Kíli rushing towards them, wincing apologetically. 

“I apologize. Are you alright?” Thorin said as he grabbed the man he almost threw to the ground, by the arm. 

“Yes, yes! I’m fine. Don’t worry,” replied the stranger, smiling slightly at Thorin. “These places are crowded and it’s not easy to go around with children, I understand.” As he said that Thorin finally noticed the boy that was beside the man, holding his other hand and looking curiously at Thorin.

“Oh my gosh! Is that the limited edition of the All Might’s themed sword?” Shrieked Kíli, pointed excitedly to the toy sword the other child was holding.

“Yes! Uncle Bilbo got it for me for my birthday.” Said the boy, smiling proudly and looking at the man Thorin had bumped into. “Do you want to play with me? I have to go to my dancing class later but I have some time now and I have more toys!” Offered the boy after a moment of hesitation, looking excitedly at the prospect of Kíli agreeing. 

Both his nephews gasped excitedly and looked at Thorin.

“Can we uncle?” Asked Fíli, pulling on the hand Thorin still was holding.

“Promise I’ll be good. I won’t wander off again.” Kíli said.

“I-” Thorin looked apologetically at the man- _Bilbo_ , his mind supplied.

“There’s a park nearby if you don’t mind them playing together. Frodo doesn’t have his classes until another hour so we have some time to spare.” Bilbo offered, looking almost as thrilled by the idea of their nephews playing as the children themselves. 

“Alright, if you don’t mind then I suppose it’s alright,” Thorin said, offering Bilbo a smile. “I’m Thorin, by the way,” Thorin added, offering his hand to Bilbo for him to shake. 

“Bilbo.” He replied. “And this is Frodo, my nephew.” He added as he put a hand on the boy’s shoulder.

“I’m Fíli, and this is my brother Kíli.” Said his eldest nephew. “Thorin is also our uncle.”

Thorin suppressed an amused smile, what were the odds. Two uncles meeting while looking after their nephews.

They walked together to the park, fairly empty as the cold seemed to have kept people from leaving their homes. Thorin inwardly wished to be one of those. He wouldn’t have minded being curled on the sofa, watching a movie or simply napping. 

He and Bilbo sat down on a bench nearby as the boys run off to play, swords and dolls in hands. 

“Thank you for agreeing,” Bilbo said, as he looked at his nephew with a smile. “We just moved a few months ago and Frodo hasn’t been able to make many friends just yet, but he seems to like your nephews very much. They are quite lively.” Bilbo added with as he chortled. 

“That’s one way of putting it.” Thorin laughed amused. “They have slight problems to make friends in the long run. Kíli being a bit too much for other children that don’t understand his hobbies or in Fíli’s case that prefers to ditch his friends in favour of staying with his brother.” Thorin explained. 

It had been much worse since Joli died, out of everyone the one who took it the worst was by far Fíli and in his grief, he had turned overly attached to his younger brother. It had already been three years and Fíli sometimes still behaved as it had happened less than a month ago. It worried Thorin and Dís but the therapist had said to simply let Fíli mourn, to grieve at his own pace and to try to introduce him to new children whenever the occasion arose. Trying to pull him forcefully away from his brother wasn't going to work, he had to be the one to let go. 

“Well, I’m sure they just need to find the right sort of friends,” Bilbo commented, looking amusedly as Kíli pretended to be the villain, giving his evil monologue from the top of the slide, having taken one of the dolls as his prisoner. 

Thorin hoped that was the case, the man looked awfully sure and that, strangely enough, gave Thorin some sort of hope. 

After that they watched the children play in silence, laughing at their antics and Bilbo even booed when the ‘heroes’ won, saying that Kíli had made a very likeable villain. 

But faster than the children would have liked Frodo and his uncle had to leave. 

“Why don’t we invite them, uncle? I wanna play with Frodo again! He likes bugs and knows all the names of the heroes of the All Might's show” Kíli asked Thorin when Frodo was about to leave. 

“Yeah! He should come! We can show him our train model! The one dad made for us! Frodo said that his dad also liked trains.” Fíli agreed.

“Can I uncle?” Asked Frodo, looking at Bilbo and bouncing excitedly on the balls of his feet. 

“I- Uhm.” Bilbo looked at him. “Would mind if Frodo went one day? Of course, I wouldn't want to impose but-” 

“Of course not, the boys have clearly hit it off,” Thorin said, cutting him off and quickly pulled out his phone from his pocket. “Here. Give me your number, we can arrange a date for when we’re both free.” Thorin passed the phone to Bilbo, and he quickly added his number. 

Thorin amusedly looked at the name he had put.

_Bilbo Baggins (Frodo’s uncle)_

“Very well then, I’ll wait for your text. We have to go now, it’s already quite late as it is. Bye boys, it was a pleasure to meet you.” He told Fíli and Kíli as he smiled and waved his hand at them. 

Thorin said goodbye as well and smiled as Frodo hugged his nephews, promising them they would see each other very soon. 

They left in a hurry, almost running as they turned down the street to take the bus. 

Meanwhile, Thorin and the boys went back to the market, to go buy Kíli’s ornament and look around the stands they hadn’t seen yet.*

As they headed home — a few ornaments in their bag than Thorin had meant to buy — and the boys chattering bout what they were going to play at when Frodo arrived, he absently thought it had been a good idea to go to the market. 

  
  
  


**Day 9**

Despite what Frodo might have previously said to his new friends, Bilbo didn’t have the chance to take him to their house until more than a week later. Thorin’s and his schedule making it impossible to meet up earlier.

They arrived at the tall building that had the direction Thorin had sent him and rode the elevator to the last floor. They rang the doorbell and as soon as the door was opened Frodo rushed to greet his friends. Bilbo envied them, they had met and played just once but they were already as good as best friends. 

“We’re so happy you’re here Frodo! You have to see our bedroom, it has lots of toys!” Kíli cheered, watching impatiently as Frodo hastily took off his coat.

“Yeah! We also have lots of comics and books, you’re gonna like them.” Fíli said, more calmly but not less excited.

“Here,” said a voice from behind Bilbo, making him jump in surprise. 

He turned and saw Thorin holding his hand out. Bilbo blinked at it, unsure of what he wanted. Bilbo panicked.

Oh no. Was he supposed to bring something? He should have, they were guests after all. Bother it all! His father always told him he had to bring a gift whenever he went to someone’s house and now Bilbo surely had given the worst impre-

“Your coat,” clarified Thorin, cutting off Bilbo’s frantic thoughts.

“Oh,” Bilbo said. “Right.” He added, laughing awkwardly. 

He passed his coat and then Frodo’s as well when the boy gave it to him, thanking Thorin quietly.

Thorin guided him towards the living room and Bilbo noticed how spacious and well decorated the apartment looked. 

“Would you like something to drink?” Thorin asked, stiffly.

“No, thank you, I’m- I’m good.” Said Bilbo without even thinking, and then inwardly grimaced. 

He didn’t know why he had said that. He was actually really thirsty, but now it was too late to say anything, Thorin had sat down on the sofa and it would be awkward to make him get up again and try to explain why Bilbo had even rejected his offer.

Bilbo had never felt this nervous or awkward in his life, not even in that miserable first date he had had with that boy back in high school, or that time his aunt Muriel fell asleep on his shoulder. They still didn’t talk about that.

He didn't understand it, they had been able to talk normally back in the park, but now it seemed almost impossible. Thorin looked as nervous as Bilbo and was sitting on the sofa stiff as a board, a closed up expression on his face Bilbo didn't know how to interpret.

This was very uncomfortable.

He sat down on the sofa as well, focusing on the TV and trying to not think about how thirsty he was.

The brothers quickly ushered Frodo to their bedroom and Bilbo mournfully watched him, absently pondering as him and Thorin remained on the sofa in an awkward silence — the TV on a cooking show — where his ability to make friends had gone. 

They watched as the chef on the TV explained how to make the perfect chocolate cup since winter was close.

Bilbo snorted.

“What?” Thorin asked, looking alarmed. “Is there something wrong? Do you need anything?”

Strangely enough, his panicked demeanour made Bilbo relax, feeling oddly calm as he realized Thorin was even more nervous than him, and just like Bilbo, was still trying hard to make it work. Most likely — once again, just like Bilbo — for his nephews.

Bilbo exhaled loudly, feeling the awkwardness suddenly not as heavy as before.

Taking his chance, Bilbo suddenly asked, “would like to try my hot chocolate recipe?” Because if hot chocolate didn’t work as the ice breaker he wasn’t sure if he wanted to try this ‘friends’ thing with Thorin. 

As he smiled at Thorin, Bilbo tried his best not to think how strange his question must have sounded, offering to make chocolate in a house that wasn’t his. 

How rude.

Thorin looked at him in surprise but quickly forced a smile on his face, clearly as out of his depth as Bilbo but as willing to try his best for his nephews’ sake. 

Good, at least this was something they both had in common.

“I suppose it’s fine.” Thorin agreed, dubiously. “What brought it, though? If you don’t mind me asking, that’s it.”

“Oh, well,” Bilbo said, clearing his throat. “I just saw the chocolate they were making on the telly,” Bilbo pointed at the finished cup of chocolate — way too plain if anyone asked Bilbo — that was on the TV, “and I thought that the boys might like drinking some. I know a better recipe than that one.” He added, hoping that would make Thorin more willing.

“Aye, why not? You’re right, the boys will be thrilled to drink chocolate, besides, the weather has been far too cold to be just November.”

Weather, yes. Bilbo could do that.

“I know!” Bilbo exclaimed, launching into the topic as if his life depended on it, as he followed Thorin towards the kitchen. “Last night we had to sleep with the heater on and Frodo even came to sleep with me because his room was too cold. I quite prefer spring myself, even if it rains a lot.” 

“Aye, me too.” Replied Thorin, pulling out mugs and a saucepan. ”I do my work much better in spring, it gives you the best views.”

“Oh really? What do you do?”

“I’m a photographer,” Thorin replied, as he took out almost all the contents outside of his pantry and laid them on the counter. “I’m not quite sure what you might need, but I think we have everything if not, there’s a grocery store nearby...” Thorin offered a bit hesitantly.

Bilbo eyed the counter and took account of what he saw, and except for the nutmeg everything he needed was there, even the white chocolate! “Don’t worry! This is all I need.” Bilbo told him as he separated the ingredients from the rest of the food Thorin had pulled out.

“Great.” Replied Thorin, as he began storing the rest again. 

They remained in silence and Bilbo couldn’t help but feel slightly uncomfortable as Thorin watched him make the chocolate, albeit it was his fault for offering but it still was a bit awkward. “So a photographer. Do you work with people or landscapes?” Bilbo asked him, as he heated the milk in the pan.

“Both, I prefer landscapes but I’m good with both,” Thorin replied, and after a moment he asked. “What about you?”

“Oh, I’m a writer.” Bilbo tried to play it off as nonchalantly as he could, trying to deviate the topic. 

That had been stupid of him, Of course Thorin would ask about his own job.

The last thing he needed was for Thorin to find out his pseudonym, he didn’t use his real name for a reason. 

He quickly asked, loudly, and almost desperate, “would you like to help me?! So, if your nephews end up liking it, you could make it for them another time.” Bilbo hoped he had sounded natural but by judging by the startled look on Thorin’s face he doubted that had been the case. 

Bilbo really had to get out of the house more often. He didn’t remember making friends being this difficult, let alone just chatting with a fellow uncle. 

Bilbo was good at making idle chat, so why was it so difficult with this man?

Thorin approached him and stood by his side, eyeing the ingredients Bilbo had chosen, meanwhile Bilbo tried to push his awkwardness aside, focusing on the cooking and making a real effort in getting to know Thorin.

He asked Thorin to measure the ingredients while he stirred the milk while it heated.

Thorin did as told, meticulously and fully concentrated, as if Bilbo had asked him to measure the ingredients of a bomb and not homemade chocolate. Bilbo stifled a laugh behind his hand. It was oddly endearing.

Thorin finished and put all the ingredients measured in bowls, and the like, beside Bilbo.

“Perfect, now we add the cocoa, the sugar, the chocolate and the salt.” Bilbo began stirring the hot beverage and added, “I normally also add nutmeg but it tastes just fine without it, so it’s alright if you don’t add it.” 

Thorin nodded, his eyes focused on the chocolate. “I see, I’ll make sure to buy some next time,” Thorin said, picking up the mugs and passing then to Bilbo for him to serve the hot chocolate. “It smells very good.” He added, offering Bilbo a smile. 

It wasn’t very big but Bilbo could see it was an honest one.

“Thank you, I hope it tastes as good,” Bilbo told him, returning the smile. 

Once the cups were served he opened the bag of mini-marshmallows and poured a handful of each to then sprinkle some cinnamon and some grated chocolate on top. 

Thorin pulled out a tray and they took the chocolate to the living room, calling for the boys to come. 

As they enjoyed their chocolate, Fíli declared Bilbo the best chef among all the adults he knew, while Thorin and Frodo picked a movie for them all to watch. 

Bilbo hid a relieved smile behind his mug, delighted that the evening had gone better than he had expected, and when Thorin met his gaze and smiled, Bilbo felt his own smile widen.

Perhaps he still had the skills needed to make new friends...

  
  


**Day 18**

“Bilbo?” asked Thorin, surprised to see the man. 

“Oh, Thorin! What are you doing here?” 

“I just finished work early and decided to come here and grab some lunch,” Thorin explained, motioning the coffee and two sandwiches he was carrying on his hands, his camera holster on his shoulder. 

Taking in the hustled look, the five cups littered around the table and Bilbo’s miserable frown, he asked. “Are you alright?”

Bilbo sighed. “Not really. I’m starting my next book but the idea I had for it is not working and I seem to be stuck no matter what I do. I have been meaning to write a children’s book for years and now that I finally got an idea approved by my editor and time — since Frodo is on a school trip until tomorrow — I find myself unable to write anything.” Bilbo said, morosely.

At that moment Bilbo’s stomach decided to let out a loud rumble, and he flushed in embarrassment while Thorin chuckled at him. 

“Have you eaten anything apart from tea since you came here?” Asked Thorin.

“No, I was too engrossed looking at the blank page of my draft.”

Thorin looked at him, pensively and after coming up with an idea he nodded to himself. “Okay, we’re gonna have lunch and then you’re coming with me,” Thorin announced.

“Coming? Where to?” Bilbo asked, startled at the sudden announcement.

“To my favourite place,” Thorin explained, smirking at Bilbo.

  
  


* * *

  
  


“Oh, my lord! How much more are we gonna walk? Thorin, I think my feet are gonna fall.” Bilbo whined as he panted.

“Not much more, a couple more minutes, It will be worth it, I promise.”

It had taken some time to convince Bilbo to leave his unwritten book and come with him, but in the end, he had agreed, only to almost refuse again when he had seen that Thorin had the intention of taking them in his bike.

It sure had been an entertaining ride, Thorin was sure Bilbo had almost crushed one of his ribs on the way when they had encountered a jam on the highway and Thorin had managed to get them out by riding around the cars. 

At one point he had been able to relax and Thorin would even say that in the end Bilbo had even enjoyed the ride — it didn’t matter what Bilbo said about Thorin trying to kill him — Thorin was _positive_ he had enjoyed it. At the very least the ride had skyrocketed Bilbo’s adrenaline and if anything else failed at least that would help him relax enough to get rid of some of his stress.

They had parked the bike on the bottom of the hill and now were climbing the stairs that led to the lookout Thorin was intending to take Bilbo.

“I like to come here and take pictures of the city. I normally don’t bring anyone here but you looked like you needed the break.” Thorin commented, trying to distract Bilbo until they arrived. “The only other person I have brought was Joli.” He added.

“Joli?” Bilbo asked, slightly breathless as he struggled to climb the stairs.

“Fíli’s and Kíli’s father, my sister’s husband. He died three years ago.” Thorin clarified.

Strangely enough, during all the time, they had known each other the topic of why Thorin was the one taking care of his nephews or why Frodo never mentioned his parents had never come up. 

Perhaps it was because both were in similar situations, uncles taking care of their nephews, and had enough people prying on their lives to do the same to each other. Thorin wasn’t entirely sure, but none the less he was grateful for it. Now he could offer some insight on his own volition and not because Bilbo had pried the answer from him.

“Oh. I’m so sorry.” Bilbo said, and unlike all the times Thorin had heard that phrase this time Bilbo did look like he was sorry both his nephews and Thorin had to go through that. As if he, somehow could understand how deep that loss was.

“It's been hard since he died,” Thorin said, a faint ache on his heart but thankfully the tears no longer gathering on his eyes like they once did when even thinking about Joli was just too much. “He was a hero,” Thorin told Bilbo, smiling proudly at the memory. “He was a firefighter and saved many lives. He was one of the kindest men I’ve ever met." Thorin exhaled loudly and added, "he died saving a young lass from a falling building, the little girl survived but he did not.”

Bilbo didn’t say anything for a while, simply taking Thorin’s hand in his own and squeezing it tightly as they kept climbing the stairs. 

Just as they were reaching the top Bilbo said, so quietly Thorin almost didn’t hear him. “Both of Frodo’s parents are dead. They drowned in the sea and Frodo almost did too. It happened almost two years ago.” 

“I’m sorry,” Thorin said, wishing that the connection he and Bilbo shared as people who had lost so much didn't exist.

“Thank you, It was the hardest month of my life,” Bilbo said, his voice breaking at the edges. “I thought I was going to see my nephew die. He was in a coma for almost two weeks and flat-lined once on the way to the hospital.” Bilbo took a deep breath. “But he didn’t, my boy is very strong and suddenly, before I even had time to process it I was his full-time guardian. The first two months were the worst, he had nightmares all the time and didn’t fully understand what was happening and I kept screwing things up, having no experience looking after a child aside from some punctual babysitting.”

Thorin didn't know what to say. To think that a child as sweet and lively as Frodo had almost lost his life was heartwrenching.

“Fíli was the one that took it the worst,” Thorin said after a moment of processing everything Bilbo had said.

Thorin didn’t like talking about Joli’s death or anything related to it, but with Bilbo, it felt natural. Both of them had gone through something similar and in a way, it was freeing to say this, to someone who hadn’t met Joli but understood Thorin’s pain. Someone who was a friend but hadn’t been directly affected by losing Joli. 

“How is he now?” Asked Bilbo, sitting down on a bench, that was just a few meters from the path that led to the lookout.

Thorin sat with him. “Better, he still has bad days but I think he’s doing better. He and Kíli go to see a therapist. It helps.” 

“Frodo and I also go to see a therapist, he’s been doing really well lately. I think your nephews are the reason why.” Bilbo turned to look at him for the first time since they had begun talking about this topic.

“Frodo is very good for them as well. I’m thankful we met that day.”

“How about their mother?” Asked Bilbo quietly, after a moment. “Is she okay?”

“She’s very strong. Out of all of us, she was the one to get back on her feet the fastest. I think it was because deep down she knew this could happen, but I know it hurts her. Joli was her best friend and the love of her life and I know being so little with the boys is something she feels guilty about.” Thorin quickly added, “she’s a pilot so she travels a lot.”

“It must be hard, her being away so often,” Bilbo said.

“It is, for all of us, but it has always been like that, Joli was the prime caretaker of the boys but I was the one who looked after them when he was at work on an emergency so when he died I decided to step up. Dís was about to leave her job, even though it was the last thing she wanted. I think that if she had to give up her job on top of that it would have destroyed her.” Thorin said, feeling the words slip from his mouth without any effort. 

It was so odd. Thorin had never talked about this with anyone, it felt too personal, the wound too fresh at the time, but now, talking with Bilbo it felt like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. As if the thoughts that he had never voiced had been dragging him down.

Bilbo didn’t say anything, and Thorin didn’t expect him to, he simply bumped his shoulder against Thorin and rested his weight against him, a comforting sort of weight. Thorin appreciated it.

“Were you and Frodo’s parents close?” Asked Thorin.

“His father was my cousin.” Explained Bilbo. “And his mother was my best friend. It was hard but in the end, I was the best choice to stay with Frodo. I lost my mother fairly young and then my father when I was twenty. I never wanted Frodo to feel as lonely as I felt then, so after being signed up as his guardian for three months I adopted him and gave him as much love and patience as I could.” Bilbo smiled at him, bright and proud, and Thorin felt his heart lighter. 

Despite the heavy and sad topics they had talked about he felt happy, in a strangely bittersweet way. 

Thorin smiled back at him and took his hand, pulling him up again. “Come on! It’s just around the corner, I promise you’ll like it.”

Bilbo groaned but still got up, Thorin chuckled at his resigned look and tugged at him, still holding his hand and not realizing he had been doing it until Bilbo let go, gasping in surprise and running to the railing that was on the edge of the hill, the view of the entire city in front of them. 

“This is beautiful!” Exclaimed Bilbo, a wide smile on his face.

“I knew you would like it,” Thorin said, feeling glad he had thought of bringing his camera with him. “I found it by chance when I was trying to find migrating butterflies.” He added as he turned his camera on. 

Suddenly he heard a flapping noise and quickly called out, “Bilbo, look this way.” Snapping a shot as soon as Bilbo turned, mid laughter as a flock of sparrows flew startlingly close by, the city cast in shadows — as the setting sun disappeared — as background. 

Bilbo simply looked mildly surprised at being photographed but seemed to not mind as he kept smiling at Thorin, turning around to look at the sparrows that had almost crashed against him.

Thorin kept taking photos of the setting sun and the city, looking almost magical in the light. He took Bilbo around all the places the lookout had and even the part of the hill that connected to the forest where fireflies could be seen. They stayed until the moon turned up and slowly made their way back down.

“I had a lot of fun, thank you,” Bilbo said as Thorin dropped him off in front of his house. 

“You’re very welcome, I’m glad I could be of help.” Thorin took the spare helmet from Bilbo and before the man entered inside his house he asked, “that new book, is it for Frodo?”

”I- Yes, yes it is.” Admitted Bilbo.

“Then you shouldn’t overthink it, just write your love for him and I’m sure that will be enough,” Thorin told him.

Bilbo looked surprised but then, after a moment, he smiled, softly and sweetly Thorin had never seen before, making him feel suddenly breathless. “Thank you Thorin, I’m glad you’re my friend,” Bilbo said, before closing the door behind him. 

After that Thorin headed to his apartment in a haze, glad the boys were with Dís that day. He entered his apartment and made himself dinner almost mechanically, his head still focused on Bilbo’s smile and him having called Thorin his ‘friend’.

It wasn’t until he was on the phone with Dwalin, talking about meeting for lunch the next day, that he decided to look at the pictures he had taken that evening. 

“Is it odd for friends to hold hands?” Thorin suddenly asked, cutting Dwalin off in his mid-rant about whether Bombu’s homemade eggnog was better than the ale he and Balin made for Christmas. 

“ _What?_ ” Dwalin asked, sounding baffled.

Thorin didn’t say anything, what he had asked finally sinking in, making his cheeks burn in embarrassment.

“ _If yer a six-year-old boy, then I guess it’s fine, why?_ ”

Thorin glared at the white wall in front of him, he should have known better than asking Dwalin of all people…

“ _You wanna hold hands or something? Kinda stupid but if ye want I’ll do it._ ” Dwalin added, reluctantly after Thorin once again didn’t say anything.

Thorin felt a smile tug at his lips and said, “thanks, Dwalin.” amusedly, but quickly changed topics wanting to avoid any possible questions to which Thorin didn’t have the answer to.

It was as he was about to fall asleep that he looked one last time at the picture he had taken of Bilbo and thought that the man was surely beautiful, in a very unique way.


	2. Chapter 2

**Day 23**

Thorin walked through the cold streets with Fíli’s hand on his own. His nephew was trembling slightly, be it from the cold or the excitement, Thorin couldn’t say.

Had been up to him he would have spent the day sleeping in and watching TV rolled up in blankets on the sofa, but this was Fíli’s special day and when Dís’ plane had been delayed due to bad weather Thorin had to step in and be the one to go with Fíli instead. Kíli had stayed with Dwalin, understanding Fíli wanting to go without him. 

Fíli had been waiting for this chance since forever, Joli’s favourite author was doing a book signing event and Fíli wanted to meet the person that had written his late father’s favourite books. Being completely honest Thorin also wanted to meet them, if only to thank them for helping Fíli deal with his grief. It had been no secret Joli loved those fantasy books, rereading them over and over, the covers almost frayed with how much it was handled. 

Before he had died Joli had loved to read them to Fíli and Kíli before bed and when the sadness over losing him became too much for the boy Fíli would read the books, helping him calm down. 

In the beginning, it had worried Thorin and Dís but the therapist had insisted it was a good healthy way to cope. Since Joli’s death, Fíli had been having trouble expressing his sorrow and grief and more often than not he simply closed off and swallowed his negative feelings, but the therapist said the books helped him process those feelings at his own pace, the story distracted him from and made him feel closer to his father. 

Thorin couldn’t deny it, in the past three years Fíli had slowly been getting better, and he couldn’t deny that a great part of that had been those books. It had become a source of comfort for the boy and at this point, everyone in their family had read them. Thorin could admit they were good. Really good.

So Thorin liked the author and had even read a few of their newer books but that didn’t mean he wanted to meet them on such a dreary day. It was cold and cloudy and Thorin had barely slept a few hours, working on assembling the album of a commissioned wedding photoshoot. Thorin still couldn’t believe that had happened. 

He changed overpriced wages for wedding photoshoots in hopes no one would hire him for them but occasionally it happened and if anything the money he got from it made the hassle worth it. 

They entered the bookshop and Thorin looked around it, finding the place where the signing would take place, they were early by half an hour but the queue was already quite sizable.

“I can’t believe _Ulotrichous_ decided to do a book signing. This is the third one they have done since they wrote their first book, like, almost ten years ago!” Fíli said, excitedly, clutching tightly at a newer copy of the first books of the series. All the others had been signed for Joli years before.

“Aye, I’m surprised as well,” Thorin said, and it was true, he was curious to find out what they looked like, he didn’t even know if _Ulotrichous_ were a woman or a man, having such a strange name as their pseudonym. Thorin still had some trouble pronouncing it, something that made him slightly resentful.

They waited on the line, and after the owner of the shop announced the signing would begin in ten minutes, someone finally made his way towards the table and sat down on the chair meant for the author, Thorin lifted Fíli on his arms and twisted them so they both see the person, only for Thorin to choke on his spit and almost make Fíli fall down. 

“Bilbo?!” Exclaimed Thorin.

“Mister Bilbo?!” Shouted Fíli at the same time.

Everyone turned to look at them, even Bilbo, looking surprised at them, he weaved at them bashfully and after a moment of hesitance, he motioned for them to go towards him. Thorin reluctantly put Fíli down, who still had a stricken look on his face, and walked towards Bilbo.

“I- Well, hello. I didn’t expect to see you here.” Bilbo said, getting up and meeting them halfway.

“Yo- You are _Ulotrichous_?” Croaked Fíli, looking an odd mix between faint and awed.

“I- Yes,” Bilbo admitted. “I had no idea you liked my books, they’re not exactly children's stories.” 

“I do!” Fíli shouted and then grimaced when everyone looked at them after his shout. More quietly he explained, “my father used to read them to me, before- Before he died.” 

“Oh.” Bilbo said, looking surprised, after a moment he added, “I’m very honoured he liked my books.” Voice soft and smile even softer, he added, “He was a hero.”

Thorin felt his heart shudder at the reminder, turning to look at Fíli he saw as his eyes welled up with tears and as before Thorin could even think of comforting his nephew he threw himself at Bilbo.

“I miss him so much,” Fíli whispered, tears running down his face. “I know he saved that little girl but I wish he hadn’t because then he would be with me.” He tightened the hold he had around Bilbo’s waist and let out a half-choked sound. “I know I’m very selfish and bad to think that, but I just want my dad back, I want him to hug me and him to sing to me.” 

Thorin’s heart broke for his nephew. This was the first time Fíli had admitted anything like that since Joli had died. Thorin had had his suspicions for a while that Fíli had carried that sort of resentment. They had had the chance to meet the little girl that Joli had saved and out of everyone the only one that had refused to meet her had been Fíli, glaring at the room she was interned at the hospital. He never talked about it and no matter how much Thorin pressed he simply refused to talk about it.

“Oh, darling, I know it hurts and you’re not selfish at all for wanting him back. It’s okay to feel the way you do and it’s okay to cry and let it all out.” Bilbo said, hugging Fíli tightly against him. He picked the boy, grunting slightly from the effort and walked towards a more secluded area of the library, so no one would see Fíli cry. 

Thorin followed close behind, carrying the book Fíli had almost dropped when he had jumped towards Bilbo.

“Do you remember in the second book of the saga? When Rose lost Minty? Do you remember how sad she was and how much she suffered her loss?” Bilbo asked Fíli and Thorin silently passed a tissue to the still sniffing boy.

“Thank you.” Fíli said to Thorin, then he turned his head towards Bilbo and responded, “yeah, I remember. It was very sad.” He added, looking down miserably at his feet.

“Losing someone is always sad but as time goes on it gets better. I won’t tell you that one day you will stop missing your dad, or that one day you’ll stop feeling sad that he’s no longer with you, but it does get better with time. You learn how to deal with the pain, but before that happens you have to let yourself feel the pain, you have to let yourself be sad and angry.” Bilbo said, patting Fíli’s short blond curls. “You have to grieve, Fíli.”

“But mom, uncle and Kíli get sad when I cry,” Fíli told him, an anguished frown on his face. 

Thorin closed his eyes as guilt crashed against him. He should have expected this, Fíli had always been protective of his brother and mother, never wanting to be a source of worry to them, but it used to be different with Thorin. He used to tell him what he couldn’t to his mother so he had stupidly expected the boy to talk about him when he felt sad about Joli.

Obviously, it hadn’t been the case.

Thorin looked back and wondered what he had done wrong. The loss of Joli had hit him hard, he had been as best as his own brother, sometimes even closer as Frerin was always travelling with his band.

Had he been too deep on his own sorrow and grief that he hadn't noticed Fíli’s suffering? Thorin would never be able to forgive himself if that was the case.

Bilbo sighed, looking incredibly pained and resigned as if he had already been expecting that answer. Thorin wondered why that was. “That might be the case but you shouldn’t have to swallow your feelings for the sake of your family. You’re also allowed to feel sad, and crying is not always bad, Fíli. It helps you heal. One day you’ll be able to remember your day without crying but before that might need to shed many tears.” Bilbo paused for a moment. “Do you have a memory of your dad that makes you smile?” 

“Lots. B- but my favourite one is when he read your books to me, now when I read them I feel I still have some part of him with me.” Fíli explained, a faint smile on his lips. 

“Then you have to make sure to remember all of those moments, all the times your father laughed and smiled and was happy with you. I doubt he would have wanted you to be sad all on your own or to only remember the sad things about him.” Bilbo exhaled loudly before adding, “but if things ever get too much you can always talk to me, Fíli. I know what it’s like to lose your parents and Frodo does as well, we won’t judge you or be sad if you want to cry.” Bilbo said, putting a hand on Fíli’s shoulder. 

“Really?!” Fíli asked, eyes wide as he raised his head to look at Bilbo.

“Of course.” 

“Thank you,” Fíli said, a few more tears rolling down his cheeks. 

Thorin couldn’t hold it anymore and pulled the boy into a hug, swallowing down the tears that stung on his eyes.* “Why did you never tell me you felt like that?” Thorin quietly asked.

“I’m sorry, uncle. I didn’t want to worry you. You already have too much to deal with and you never have any help, I didn’t want to burden you even more. I know Kee and I are a lot sometimes and you still take care of us and love us when mom is always away, I wanted to help and not be another thing you had to worry about.” Fíli explained as he sobbed into Thorin’s arms.

“But Fíli you’re just a child, you shouldn’t have to carry with the issues of adults,” Thorin explained, swallowing thickly.

“But then how’s going to help you?! You’re always helping people and being there for everyone but no one ever is there for you. You’re also sad dad died, it’s not fair you have to comfort us all when you’re also hurting.” Fíli shouted, drawing back and meeting Thorin’s eyes, looking angry and upset. “You had to buy a bigger apartment so Kee, mum and I could move in with you and you always have a bedroom for when uncle Frerin is back from his tours.” Fíli looked down and clenched his fist. “I want to be strong like you, I want to take care of Kíli and you and mom. I wanna see you smile more and be less worried and tired and for that, I’ve to stop being a crybaby and being so sad all the time.” Fíli said, furiously rubbing at his face.

“No, Fíli, you don’t have to do that,” Thorin said, the tears he had tried so hard to hold now freely falling. “You heard Bilbo, you can’t get better unless you let yourself feel sad and angry sometimes, it’s not good to hold it all down.” Thorin cleaned the tears on Fíli’s face with his thumb. 

“Besides, I’m happy,” Thorin added. “Aye, sometimes it’s exhausting and I get worried and sad, but that’s fine, feeling like that sometimes it’s fine. It makes the happy moments more special and you and your brother make me really happy. Taking care of you gives me a sort of happiness nothing else can give me. You’re my boys, so please, Fíli, you have to let yourself mourn your dad.” Thorin said, his voice trembling.

Fíli’s lower lip wobbled and he looked at Thorin for a while before nodding. He closed the distance against and hugged Thorin tightly. “Okay,” he said. “I’ll try. It’s just- It’s very hard.” He added.

“That’s okay, Fíli.” Bilbo suddenly said, making Thorin startle, having forgotten for a moment he was there. “You can count on everyone to help you with that, alright?”

“Okay, thank you, Mister Bilbo,” Fíli said, sniffing slightly but offering a smile at Bilbo.

“Good, you’re a very good lad. Your family is very lucky to have you in their lives.” Bilbo added, patting Fíli on the head. “Now what about you being my assistant for the book signing and then we three can go have some fun afterwards?” He asked.

Thorin suddenly remembered the signing and the place they were and quickly apologized. “I’m so sorry, Bilbo, you must be very busy and we just barged in and-”

“Don’t worry about it. It’s more than alright. I honestly would rather stay here with you but I promised my editor to do one of these every few years. We’re friends, aren’t we? You can count on me, Thorin.” Bilbo said, putting his hand on top of Thorin's shoulder and giving it a squeeze.

Thorin nodded reluctantly and thanked him.

“Besides I really need an assistant, I’m sure the signing won’t last more than a couple of hours so if you don’t mind we can go for ice cream afterwards.”

“Can we uncle?” Fíli asked, his face still blotchy from crying but all the anguish had left his face.

“Sure.*” Answered Thorin, easily, making a mental note to text Dwalin to let him know they would be arriving a little later than planned.

Thorin still knew they had much to fix but this was a step closer to Fíli being better and Thorin talked the moment Bilbo and he crossed paths, feeling thankful for having the man in his life.

  
  


**Day 26**

“We really have to stop meeting like this,” Bilbo said with a laugh after Thorin had bumped on him and almost threw him to the ground. Again.

“Aye, I’m really sorry, Bilbo. Well, then, have a good day.” Thorin quickly said, looking behind him and making sure a certain someone was still entertained looking at the carrots.

He had known it was a bad idea, and now Thorin regretted having accepted. Since the moment he woke up Thorin had been having a feeling that the day wouldn’t be good for him, he should have listened to the warning. If he had, now he wouldn’t be trying to run away from Bilbo as if he had the plague while he made sure his sister hadn’t seen them interact. 

She had been wanting to meet Bilbo since the moment her boys had talked about him and Frodo for the first time. So Thorin had decided to do the smart thing and swore to try to stop them from meeting for a long as he could.

To be perfectly honest, Thorin wasn’t even sure why he dreaded their meeting so much, they surely would get along, but perhaps that was why worried him the most. 

Besides, Dís tended to be sort of pushy and loved to assume things about Thorin’s life, the last thing he wanted was Bilbo involved in that mess. 

Just recently they had become friends and Thorin wanted to treasure it peacefully for a little bit more before Dís headbutted her way in and consequently Frerin as well — even if he was half a world away he always found a way to annoy Thorin.

Sometimes the only thing that stopped Thorin from jumping on a plane and changing his name to live in the jungle — as away from his awful younger siblings as he could get— was the fact that he was the oldest and therefore didn’t have to put up with their stupidity and that if things got out of hand he had more blackmailing worthy stories over them, that they had over him.

Still, he tried to usher Bilbo in another direction, possibly outside of the little market Dís had taken him to, looking frantically around him, trying to spot the monster he had as a sister.

“Hey, there! Who’s your friend?” Suddenly came the voice Thorin least wanted to hear from beside him.

Thorin turned sharply and looked, dismayed as Dís made her way towards Bilbo.

“Hello, I’m Dís, are you good friends with my brother?” Dís asked, inspecting Bilbo like a hungry hyena would inspect its prey.

“Oh! You’re Fíli’s and Kíli’s mother!” Bilbo said, looking happy and excited at getting to meet her. Damn it, there went all of Thorin’s plans. “I’m Bilbo, Frodo’s uncle, he’s friends with your boys.” He added.

Dís’ eyes widened and a smile split her face. “You’re the famous Mr Bilbo my boys had so much to say about? I have been wanting to meet you and your nephew for a while now! My boys talk all the time about you two, even my grump of a brother had only good things to say about you.” 

Thorin gave Bilbo a tight smile when he turned to look at him at Dís’ words, slight surprise on his face. He just hoped he wasn’t blushing like a fool, the last thing he needed was to give Bilbo — or God Forbid Dís — the wrong impression. 

And why did Bilbo see the need to look surprised? They were friends, Bilbo himself had said so, of course Thorin would talk about him. 

“I’m sure Bilbo’s busy, sister, and we still have many places to go. Let’s go, I’m sure Bilbo also is _very_ busy.” Thorin insisted pointedly, trying to push Dís by the shoulders. 

“Oh, not at all. I’m free until four when I have to go pick Frodo up, so plenty of time!”

“What are you talking about? Unless you have another sister I don’t remember making any other plans.”

Thorin closed his eyes and took a deep breath and silently resisted the urge to scream.

“Would you come with us then?” Asked Dís, obviously trying to ruin Thorin's day.

“Oh, if you don’t mind I love to. But if you're busy-” Bilbo said, this time sending Thorin a hesitant look.

Thorin’s urge to scream increased but he forced it down and smiled, hoping it didn’t look as fake as it felt, and said, “of course not.”

The next couple of hours were something Thorin very gladly would like to forget while simultaneously cherish inside his heart until the day he died. Because while he had to sit and suffer through the embarrassment that was Dís recounting horrible stories of their childhood and her being an overall embarrassment, he also hadn’t seen Dís smile that much and laugh that hard since before Joli’s death, instantly having hit it off with Bilbo. He also had the opportunity to hear some of Bilbo’s own childhood stories and in retaliation, Thorin had made sure Bilbo knew about all the embarrassing things Dís had done since the day she was born. 

Even her kicks under the table hadn't stopped Thorin from talking about that chocolate incident.

They went back home barely an hour before Fíli and Kíli finished school and Dís was brimming with happiness and looking lighter than she had been in a long time. Thorin was beginning to call it the Baggins effect, both Frodo and his uncle had a way of lightening people's lives without even trying, he seriously wondered for a moment if that run in their family or it was just them that was special.

Overall Thorin was glad of having bumped once again into Bilbo, the day hadn’t gone as bad as Thorin had dreaded and now both his sister and him were in a nice mood. It could have gone much wor-

“You never mentioned Bilbo was such a cutie,” Dís said mischievously, interrupting his line of thought and with that his good mood faded into the nothingness.

Ah, there it was. Thorin should have known better.

“Stop saying nonsense Dís, why would I feel the need to tell you something like that?” Thorin asked harshly, directing a disapproving frown at his sister. 

Dís simply hummed and looked like he didn’t believe a word of what Thorin had said, but thankfully didn’t press. “If you say so...”

Of course he said so, they were merely friends after all. Dís was just being her obnoxious self, Thorin said to himself, pointedly not thinking about how sometimes he still looked at Bilbo’s picture from time to time.

Yes, Dís was just being stupid. Bilbo and he were friends, there was nothing odd about appreciating the beauty of your friends. Thorin was a photographer, it was his work to notice beautiful things, friends included.

Thorin sighed tiredly, he had known that day was going to be horrible…

**Day 30**

Bilbo had thought taking the kids to an ice rink would be a good idea. He wasn’t so sure anymore…

The last time he had put on any sort of skates he had been twenty-one and very drunk, having ended up spraining his ankle and with a broken nose. Bilbo had — very naively, he may add — thought that only the children and maybe Thorin would go on the rink while he took pictures of them and waved at them every time they passed by his side.

In hindsight, he had been very stupid to think that, but in his defence, he would say that there wasn’t any real need for him or Thorin to be there on the rink with them. All three knew how to skate very well, or at the very least not to fall.

He had thought he had all planned but Bilbo hadn’t counted on the power of three pairs of puppy eyes and one betrayed glare when he had announced he would just watch them from the benches. At such Bilbo now found himself wobbling on unsteady feet, as he grasped Thorin’s hand in a death grip, on the ice.

As it turned out neither of them knew how to skate…

Bilbo let out a shaky breath and tried to turn his head to see where Frodo had gone, yelping and holding onto Thorin’s arm when the movement almost sent him tumbling backwards to the unforgiving ice.

“Ah, shit! Don’t move, we’re gonna fall!” Thorin shouted, having managed to barely stabilize them.

“Sorry, It's just- I don’t see the boys,” Bilbo told him, moving closer to Thorin as best as he could when the skates started moving on their own to the other side.

“They’re on the other side,” Thorin grumbled. “Kíli, Fíli, Frodo! Don’t go too far away!” He screamed at the top of his lungs, making Bilbo flinch and almost crash into a little girl. “I still can’t believe you were going to leave me alone in here with those gremlins.” Thorin sent Bilbo a glare and tightened his grip on his hand as if he was afraid Bilbo would try to escape to the safe and sweet land.

Bilbo would have if he could, but he was afraid that if he let go of Thorin’s hand he would end up with another broken nose.

“I thought you knew how to skate!” Bilbo tried to defend himself and very pointedly didn’t look at the exit when they slowly passed by it.

“Why would you think that?!”

“Well, you ride a bike!”

“And how is that related in any way to ice-skating?” Thorin asked incredulously.

“You have good equilibrium and have lots of core strength, I thought you would be a natural at this,” Bilbo stated, it was obvious. He couldn’t understand why Thorin was giving him that look.

“What kind of- Oh my god!” Shrieked Thorin.

“What?!” Bilbo asked, startled.

“Look!” Thorin pointed at the far end of the rink and Bilbo’s heart almost came out of his mouth as he watched their nephews trying to imitate the jumps a bunch of teenagers — professionals, by the look of it — were doing.

“Holy God! They’re going to brain themselves!” Bilbo took a deep breath and took a better hold of Thorin’s hand, “Okay, okay. No need to panic. Come on, we can reach them. Hold tight and grab into whoever comes if you feel like falling. Better them than us.” Bilbo said, not even caring how mean that sounded.

In retrospective, he was aware that they had no reason to panic as much as they were currently doing.

If they hadn’t entered the rink with the boys they would mostly be cheering on them, praising them for experimenting and trying new things. But they had gone inside the rink and be it for their inability to even go in a straight line without falling face-first to the ice, or the fact that they couldn't reach the boys as fast as they would have liked — in case something happened — they were both beside themselves trying to get to the other side of the rink. Afraid they might slip and open their heads.

Luckily the boys noticed them before they even managed to get to the middle of the rink and run towards them when they noticed their worried faces.

“Are you okay?” Asked Kíli, being the first to arrive meanwhile Fíli and Frodo made their way slower, skating together as they held hands.

“I should be the one asking that! You’re the ones trying to fly like gravity is not a thing.” Thorin scolded him.

Kíli pouted. “But we do that all the time in class. I just wanted to try it on the ice and Frodo wanted to learn.”

Oh. Right. Fíli and Kíli took skating classes at their school.

“Ah,” Thorin said as if he had also forgotten of that fact.

“It’s not my fault you can’t do it, but don't cut our fun,” Kíli complained, moodily.

Thorin sighed and Bilbo suddenly felt very foolish for having panicked to bad. “Alright. I’m sorry, just be careful and make you don’t go too far. You never know what can happen, stay close.” Thorin said, looking tired and resigned.

The three boys made an agreeing sound and began skating again, this time closer to Thorin and Bilbo.

Thorin huffed. “I’m getting old, I’m starting to behave like my father, a couple of years earlier I would have been by their side cheering them on and I might even have tried to learn so I could do it myself. Now look at me, even that elder lady that looks over eighty years is more skilled than me!” Thorin grumpily said as he jerked his head towards an elder woman who was making her way around the rink at a startling speed.

“Alright, you’re getting gloomy. Let’s get some things straight, first, you did the responsible thing, a few years ago you weren’t taking full care of your nephews and were most likely the ‘fun uncle’ rather than their second father.” Bilbo gave him a look when Thorin tried to argue. “Let me finish. Second, I’m plenty sure that nice lady is a retired professional skater, there’s no way anyone can do what she’s doing, no matter their age. And third, before we leave today we’re going to be able to skate a full lap around the rink without falling and without wobbling like newborn fawns.” Bilbo told him decisively.

Thorin looked in surprise and then gave him a determined smile.

Bilbo cheered on his head. He was scared out of his wits but at least it got Thorin smiling and he wasn’t about to stand and just watch as Thorin called himself 'old' as if he wasn’t a very fit and handsome young man who was in the peak of his life.

Thorin took his hand and began moving his feet, gaze fixed on the people that were in front of them and trying to imitate them. Bilbo tried to do the same, and slowly — but better than at the beginning — they began advancing.

Bilbo smiled. Well, it wasn’t so ba-

Before Bilbo could even finish that thought they suddenly went tumbling to the ground after he tripped on a bit of slush, pulling Thorin down with him.

Bilbo opened his eyes and found himself looking at the sky, his back painfully stinging at his fall and Thorin fallen sprawled on top of him.

They met surprised gazes and as Bilbo heard the boys panicking calling out their names and skating towards them Bilbo laughed, Thorin doing the same not moments later.

“Well, that wasn’t so bad, last time I fell while skating I broke my nose,” Bilbo announced, between bursts of laughter.

It only made Thorin laugh harder, but he eventually got a hold of himself and with the concerned aid of their nephews he got up, offering his hand to Bilbo. “Again?”

Bilbo felt a smile curl on his lips, suddenly feeling terribly fond of the man in front of him. “Again.” He exclaimed.

In the end, it took them almost two hours and more falls that they could count with one hand but they managed to do an entire lap without falling, a smile on their faces and fingers intertwined together as they clasped each other's hand.

The next morning Bilbo couldn’t bring himself to regret it, even if he was covered in bruises and could barely walk without grimacing, but the way his stomach ached after having laughed so much and the smile of accomplishment on Thorin’s face had been more than worth it. 

The commemorative picture they had taken — and later printed — with the children, neatly placed by his nightstand.

  
  


**Day 37**

“What about this one? Do you think Dís would like this one?” Bilbo asked, holding a colourful shirt in front of him. 

“Hm, I’m not sure. I have never seen her wear this sort of sleeves, so perhaps not. You don’t really need to get her anything.” Thorin answered while he also looked for a gift for his sister and manoeuvred the rest of the bags that contained the gifts for the children.

“Of course I do, she’s very nice and yesterday when Frodo went to her house for the sleepover she gave him a plushy. She said it was for being a good friend to Fíli and Kíli but I’m sure it was because she knew he would be nervous.” Bilbo explained, surveying the rest of the things the small shop had to offer. “Besides, you invited Frodo and me to the Christmas party. It would be rude to not give anything.”

“She likes Frodo, of course she's nice to him.”

“More reason to get her a Christmas gift, everyone who likes my nephew deserves one,” Bilbo said, looking proudly at his statement.

Thorin snorted. “Only dimwits would dislike Frodo so I don’t really see your point.”

“ _My point_ is that she’s fantastic and deserves a gift.” Bilbo said, pointedly, and then added, as an afterthought, “besides she loves Neil Gaiman.” 

“Whatever you say,” Thorin said, rolling his eyes, remembering the time on the market when he had to sit through their gushing over some obscure trivia about that man’s books.

Suddenly Bilbo gasped loudly, the ugly cardigan he was holding dropping to the ground. 

“What?!” Asked Thorin startled, looking around trying to spot whatever had spooked Bilbo so much.

“I know what I’m going to give her!” 

Thorin turned his head back at him, and gave him a reproachful glare. “Did you have to sound like you had seen a ghost just to tell me that?”

Bilbo gave him an offended glare instead and Thorin rolled his eyes again, suppressing the fond smile that threatened to show on his face.

“What is it then?” Thorin asked, finally deciding on the baby blue sweater he had seen when they first arrived. He couldn’t quite remember if he had also bought her a sweater the year before but he doubted he was going to find anything better so the sweater would have to do.

“I’m not telling you.”

“What?! Why not?” Thorin exclaimed incredulously. “You know what I’m going to get her.”

“Because it’s a surprise,” Bilbo said as if that was answer enough.

“Do you think I would tell her?” Thorin gaped at him, feeling slightly hurt and offended that Bilbo didn’t trust him.

“Of course not, you’re the one I trust the most, but I’m still not sure if I’ll be able to get it in time so it’s better if it’s just me the one who knows,” Bilbo explained, putting his hand on Thorin’s arm and giving it a squeeze as he smiled at him.

Thorin sighed. “Very well, then. Have it your way, then.” Thorin bumped his shoulder lightly against Bilbo as he went to pay for the sweater, making the other man chuckled. “Come on, we have to go pick up the children and hide their gifts before those gremlins see them.”

* * *

“Are you sure about this?” Bilbo asked the boys that were currently holding his hands. 

“Yeah, just text uncle. We really need your help and if you don’t tell him anything he’ll get worried. Frodo already agreed to distract him, he knows we need your help.” Said Kíli tugging Bilbo towards a near shop and farther from where they had last seen Thorin and Frodo.

They had ended up splitting when Bilbo had been distracted with the Durin siblings and Thorin had gone to the bathroom with Frodo, and now they were trying to leave Frodo and Thorin on their own while Bilbo helped Fíli and Kíli buy Thorin’s Christmas present. 

Bilbo simply sighed, already used to the brothers’ antics, and wrote to Thorin, telling him that if he didn’t mind they could meet again in an hour in the centre of the main square.

He got an affirmative text from Thorin, wishing him luck with his nephews. Bilbo snorted amusedly. “Alright boys, let’s go. We have an hour.”

The children cheered and Fíli asked. “Bilbo, do you need any help finding a gift for uncle? We can help you.” 

“I- Well, if you would be so kind, I wouldn’t mind the help,” Bilbo said. 

He wasn’t afraid to admit he had no idea what to get for Thorin. Since they had been invited to the Christmas party it had been something that had been hunting Bilbo. He was not very good at gift-giving and the only reason he always managed to get Frodo what he wanted was that he always talked about it or because he wrote a letter to ‘Santa’.

He hoped Dís liked the book he was planning to get her, and if he played his cards well he might even get it signed by the author.

Both children took hold of Bilbo’s hand and they quickly walked through the streets towards the more commercial side of that part of the city. 

“You’re really nice Bilbo. You’re the first grown-up that we aren’t related to that we like almost as much as our family.” Kíli said as if he was talking about the weather and hadn't just said something incredibly heartwarming.

“Yeah, Kee is right. We’re really happy you’re friends with uncle Thorin and that you’re Frodo’s uncle, you’re the best.” Fíli agreed excitedly. “And you always talk to us and never mind that we’re a little bit odd.”

Bilbo frowned at that. “You’re not odd, neither of you are. You might not be like the majority of children but who wants to be? You’re special and the best of ways and if other people can’t see that they just don’t deserve your time.” Bilbo explained.

He had never planned on it, unlike Thorin, he wasn’t the best when dealing with children and to be perfectly honest, he tried to avoid them when he could but these boys were different. Before Bilbo had even noticed they had burrowed inside his heart and was starting to get attached unbelievably quickly. 

“See? You even defend us. That’s pretty nice to me. Can you be our friend as well? Mrs Walters said that grown-ups can’t be friends with children but I don’t think so. I want to be friends with you, Bilbo. Do you think we can?” Kíli asked, curiously.

Bilbo was touched, and in the back of his head thought that he should talk to Thorin about Kíli’s teacher. “Of course. I would love to be your friend.” He told the kids, giving their hands a light squeeze. “So, do you have any ideas about what to get for your uncle?”

“No.”

“Not at all.”

Bilbo held back a sigh. “Right. How about we think of something before we try to scout all the shops trying to find something he might not even want.” Bilbo directed them towards a nearby bench and they sat down. “You live with your uncle most of the time, there must have been something he has mentioned wanting or something he might need. Try to remember.” Bilbo urged.

The boys tried to bounce ideas between them, to no avail, meanwhile, Bilbo tried to offer some of his own. Just as they were about to give up and simply roam the shops in search for something Thorin might like Fíli lighted up.

“I know!” He shouted and excitedly explained, “uncle broke his favourite camera strap a couple of months ago and has been using the spare ugly one he has since then.”

Kíli gasped and started flapping his hands excitedly. “You’re right! We have to get him one! Oh, he’s going to love it!”

Bilbo smiled at them, they might be rambunctious but, apart from Frodo, they were the sweetest kids Bilbo had ever met — granted, he hadn’t met much but all he had were demons, so his point was still valid.

“Great, that’s a perfect gift, I’m sure your uncle will be ecstatic. Now, I’m pretty sure there was a photography shop around here, let me check.” Bilbo said, pulling out his phone from his pocket and one search later they were on their way to the shop.

It wasn’t as close as Bilbo had thought it was but if they were quick they would be able to meet Frodo and Thorin on time.

They entered the shop and Bilbo, much like a child, looked at all the items displayed in awe, and once he glanced at the prize of some of the things he made sure to not touch anything and urged the children to do the same.

Soon enough they had found the straps on the far end of the shop and while those were still quite pricey the boys had enough money to buy it together. 

Fíli and Kíli chose one with a colourful geometric pattern, and — according to them — similar to the one that broke. When they were about to pay the shop attendant told them they had the option of personalizing the strap by printing a name in the font they wanted and the children eagerly agreed. So with Bilbo's, they decided on a nice cursive font.

They walked around the shop waiting for the name to be added on, when Kíli shouted at them, holding something that looked like a camera lens. “Bilbo, look! Uncle is sure going to like this!” 

Bilbo felt his heart drop to the ground when he saw Kíli holding the lens, that most likely was worth more than his car, and rushed towards him. “Oh my lord, Kíli put that down!”

“Kee, be careful.” Urged his brother, also walking towards him.

“It’s okay, look, look.” The boy said, taking out the lid of the lens and showing it to them. 

Bilbo stopped in front of him, baffled.

It was a mug.

“It’s a mug!” Fíli shouted. “That’s so cool!”

Bilbo took it from Kíli’s hands and examined it. It was very interesting, it certainly looked like a camera lens but on the inside, it was a mug that could serve as a thermos. Bilbo thought of all the tea Thorin could drink on that mug, and even take it with him at work and smiled. 

Yes. It was a good gift.

“You’re a genius, Kíli!” Bilbo said, ruffling his hair and getting a thrilled giggle in response. 

Bilbo bought it and while he paid for it the strap was ready, the boys asked for it to be wrapped and Bilbo hid both of the gifts inside another bag from another shop.

They quickly made their way to the meeting point, laughing and eager to see if Thorin would like the gifts as much they wished he did.

Bilbo hid a smile, he couldn’t wait for the boys to open their own gifts. Thorin had been just as excited as them when he had chosen them, gushing to Bilbo about how much they were going to like them. 

It had taken them hours to choose the perfect toys, early in the afternoon, but Bilbo was sure this was going to be a Christmas to remember. Thorin had made sure of that.

  
  


* * *

  
  


“Oh my god.” Said Bilbo, covering his mouth to muffle his laughter.

Thorin glared at him, but he still had a barely suppressed smile on his face so he doubted it had much effect. How he had been convinced of this he wasn’t entirely sure.

One minute they were meeting at the centre square, the gifts Frodo and he had chosen for Bilbo safely hidden on his backpack, then the next one Bilbo and Frodo were ushering him and his nephews inside a shop that was clad in all sorts of Christmas items, and sold even more.

Now he was standing in front of the fitting room with a sweater — could that monstrosity be called sweater though? — that was filled with tiny deformed reindeers and on top of each of their noses, there was a small fuzzy ball. To top the outfit Kíli had put an antlers headband and a red nose on his face. Thorin had never felt uglier. 

Quickly he went to the sweaters section again, ignoring the way people were looking at him and sniggering and picked another monstrosity, shoving it into Bilbo’s hands and pushing him in the fitting room. “I’m not suffering alone.” He threatened.

Bilbo laughed from the other side of the curtain but complied and one minute later he was clad in a neon bright pink sweater with green and red snowflakes as a pattern, an ugly cat wearing a Santa hat in the middle that was made out of sequins and a blue dialogue that said ‘ho ho ho’. Fíli put an elf hat on top of Bilbo’s curls and Thorin managed to take a picture between his laughter. 

They kept trying sweaters and Thorin took pictures of everyone, the one where Kíli looked like garish Igor when he had put on a multicoloured cape and a pair of glasses which eyes bounced around crazily, was his favourite. But in the end, they decided to seriously choose one to wear to the Christmas party. Apparently, it was a tradition of the Baggins family to spend Christmas in ugly sweaters and each year Frodo and Bilbo chose one for each other.

They decided to get matching sweaters, it was Kíli’s idea but in the end, everyone was on board and the children seemed happy to be able to wear the same clothes, announcing they were like friendship sweaters.

Bilbo had laughed and that and gave Thorin a sweet smile, also content with the chosen sweaters.

Thorin felt his heart happily shudder inside of him, and thought that he wouldn’t mind wearing matching clothes with Bilbo more often.


	3. Chapter 3

**Day 40**

Bilbo masterfully cracked his eggs in a small bowl and hid a smile as Thorin fumbled with his own, bits of eggshell mixing with the yolk.

In his defence signing up to the cookie making workshop hadn’t been his idea. It had been Frodo’s. He had seen the advertisement on the TV and had insisted on Bilbo calling Thorin to see if they all could go. 

Bilbo, of course, had agreed, it would be a fun and nice experience for the children and well, if perhaps he wanted to prove to all the participants he was the better cook, that was between himself and Frodo — who of course had managed to convince him first saying he should show the rest of the participants how a cookie is really done. Sometimes Frodo was too smart for his own good…

“What are these eggs made of? I can barely crack them” Grumbled Thorin by his side. 

“They’re high-quality eggs, just crack it harder against the bowl.” Bilbo patiently explained while he mixed butter with sugar into another bowl.

Bilbo had the delight of seeing Thorin glare at the eggs before he suddenly smashed one against the side of his bowl, hard enough to make it break into little pieces and send bits of yolk and white flying everywhere, some of it hitting Bilbo on the face.

Bilbo looked in astonishment at Thorin’s stunned gaze, still fixed on the shattered egg — or what remained of it — that he still held in his hand. Bilbo bit his lips, trying very hard not to laugh, but the children didn’t have the same qualms, bursting into laughter at the mess Thorin had made. Even the family that was in front of them snorted a bit. Thorin was pulled out from his shock and he snorted, amused but slightly embarrassed, judging by the rosy tinge of his cheeks.

“Next time, I’m breaking the eggs,” Fíli said between giggles while his brother was almost in tears with how hard he was laughing.

“Very well, little chef. Next time you break the eggs.” Thorin agreed with an amused chuckle as he tried to wipe the goo of the egg from his hand. 

Bilbo passed his bowl to Frodo and motioned for him to keep whisking, while he walked towards Thorin’s side of the table and helped him clean up so they could start again. By then, most of the families were looking at them curiously, especially the elderly couple with their granddaughters that sat in front of them. 

“Is everything alright over here?” Asked one of the instructors, pleasantly.

“Yes, yes, don’t worry. We’re fine.” Bilbo told her, pulling another bowl from the shelf that was under the table.

“Alright,” she said, dubiously but not willing to press, and quickly went away when someone called her.

Bilbo huffed.

He didn’t need any _help_ . If anything _they_ needed help from Bilbo.

Their recipe was bland and uninteresting, a basic bunch of vanilla cookies that tasted more like cardboard and the only thing exciting about them was the shape the cutter would give them.

No, sir. Over his dead body. Bilbo wasn’t about to make cardboard cookies, and neither was Frodo.

“What is Frodo making?” Kíli asked, peering at Frodo who was very focused on whisking the butter and the sugar to perfection. “He’s not doing what the lady said at the beginning.”

“That’s because we’re not following that recipe, we don’t like it so we have decided to make sugar Christmas cookies.” Bilbo explained proudly, he then looked at them in consideration, and asked, “would you like to help?” 

“Yes!” The boys shouted and left their places beside Thorin to run towards Frodo. 

“Is that why you were grumbling and muttering under your breath while the instructor was explaining the recipe?” Thorin asked, amused.

“Well, it’s hardly my fault they decided to make the blandest of all cookies. I didn’t pay sixteen pounds so I and Frodo can make some cardboard cookies.” Bilbo explained morosely, feeling his cheeks getting hotter under Thorin's scrutiny.

Thorin snorted and said, “very well, then. I suppose I'll be doing the cardboard cookies on my own.” 

“Don’t be silly, you’re making the _good_ cookies with us. Bring your bowls, we’re baking one batch while the boys make another.” Bilbo merrily said, already pilling a bunch of the bowls and utensils towards his side of the table.

“Oh, the _good_ cookies?” Thorin asked, teasingly with a tilt of his brow.

“The _superior_ cookies.” Bilbo rectified.

They finished taking all of Thorin’s utensils and quickly Bilbo pulled out and measured the ingredients to catch up to the children. “Frodo is very good,” Thorin mentioned as he helped Bilbo. “Does he go to cooking classes?”

“Oh, no. We just cook a lot together. He enjoys it and when he’s not feeling so good it helps him relax and calm down.” Bilbo explained.

Quickly Bilbo explained what he had to do while he went to help the children in the next step. Overall they weren’t as bad as Bilbo had feared, especially Thorin — it turned his previous fumbling with the eggs had been a punctual thing — but Fíli, in particular, showed a real talent for it, and he clearly enjoyed and had a genuine interest to learn.

Bilbo decided that doing a baking day a couple times a month for the three boys in his house would be a good experience for all of them. 

Meanwhile, Thorin and he quickly caught up and soon enough, faster than any other of the families, they finished their dough. 

Bilbo felt a pleasant warmth when Thorin sent him a triumphant smile and smiled back at him. 

His friendship with Thorin was one of the best gifts he could have gotten. It had been barely over a month since they had met and yet Thorin had come to be such an important part of his life, he along with his nephews had come to mean very much to Frodo and him.

It was nice. 

Bilbo wasn’t used to having many friends. He had Hamfast and used to have Primula and Drogo but all of them lived in the village Bilbo had been born, so it was difficult to meet and video calls could go so far.

Thorin was new, it was exciting to be with him. Their friendship began due to convenience and over having bonded over being uncles that raised their nephews, but now it was different, it was much more than that.

Now whenever he was with Thorin Bilbo could have fun without the children having to be in the middle of it, Thorin made Bilbo happy, he made Bilbo feel special in the most unusual ways. 

Their friendship was easy and with Thorin, Bilbo felt like he could be unapologetically himself. In the beginning, it had been because Bilbo had nothing to lose if Thorin didn’t like him but after a while, it was because Thorin _liked_ him, even after learning about Bilbo’s idiosyncrasies. 

He didn’t mind Bilbo’s nervous muttering or that he prioritized Frodo or his work over everything else, moreover he understood it. He enjoyed watching cheesy movies and learning to do new things with Bilbo. He didn’t get upset over Bilbo teasing him and gave just as much back. It was easy and it was comfortable, with Thorin, Bilbo felt like he could talk about anything and everything and Thorin would listen to him. 

Perhaps they had just begun being friends but Bilbo had never had a relationship like the one he had with Thorin and he wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.

“Alright, boys. Now we have one last step left before putting the cookies in the oven.” Bilbo said, smiling at them. 

“Oh, yes, yes! Me first!” Frodo cheered, lifting his hand as high as he could.

“What is it?” Asked Kíli.

“Why don’t you explain Frodo?” Suggested Bilbo, his smile widening at the curious glances of the Durins.

“You gotta do this.” Frodo began and then blew softly on the cookies. “This is the most important step, otherwise your food might end up tasting nasty.” 

“What’s that for? What did you do?” Asked Fíli, peering into the cookies to see if Frodo had done something without him noticing despite him being there the whole time.

“I’m adding love,” Frodo explained proudly, hands on his hips and nose high in the air. “Uncle and my mom said that without love your food can’t be delicious so we always add some, you just have to think of the people you love the most and blow that love on the food.”

Kíli and Fíli looked thoughtful but after a moment they both nodded while Thorin looked charmed by the story.

Then, without prior notice, Kíli turned to look at Thorin and said, “Is that why your meatloaf tastes so awful? Have you been feeding it to us _without_ love?” Kíli asked his uncle, squinting suspiciously at him, looking almost betrayed at the idea.

Bilbo covered his mouth with his hand and tried to stifle the cackle that almost burst out of him while Thorin sputtered indignantly beside him.

“I’ll have you lads know that I cook all my food with love, you just don’t see it when I put it,” Thorin said, defending himself. “And what do you mean my meatloaf tastes awful?”

“There are more ways to put love than just blowing,” Bilbo said, trying to placate the boy. “And I’m sure your meatloaf tastes marvellously Thorin.”

"You say that 'cause you haven't tasted it." Mumbled Fíli by his side and Bilbo softly elbowed him.

“Oh, okay then.” Said Kíli, calming down. “Your meatloaf might not be that good but I really like your blackberry cobbler! I- I know you make it with lots of love. Sorry for saying you didn't.” He added, peering at Thorin from under his lashes, more quietly and slightly sheepish.

Thorin smiled at him and said, “thank you.” as he ruffled his unruly chocolate hair.

One by one everyone blew a little bit of love on the cookies and when it was Bilbo’s turn he made sure to include Thorin, Fíli, Kíli and Dís among the ones he loved.

  
  


* * *

  
  


“Oh, you made different cookies...” Mentioned the instructor, sounding baffled as she made her way around the room, looking at the end results.

“Yes, we’re making superior cookies.” Announced Kíli happily, while Bilbo looked at him in alarm.

“Uncle Bilbo said yours taste like cardboard and that he wasn’t paying to make those,” Frodo explained, showing her one of the snowman cookies he had decorated.

The lady, whose name Bilbo couldn’t for the life of him remember simply said “oh” at that, looking astonished and quite miffed. 

For his part, Bilbo felt his soul leave his body and wished the earth would swallow him whole. By his side, Thorin was cackling like a hyena. Bilbo elbowed him to shut him up, failing completely as it made him laugh even louder. 

Right. Bilbo was never again showing his face in that shopping mall and if Thorin burst a lung with his stupid laughter Bilbo wasn’t going to help him.

Served him right for being such a traitor...

  
  


**Day 49**

Clad in the not so ugly Christmas sweater they had chosen, Thorin looked around the room, watching as his sister laughed with Bilbo in the kitchen at something Balin had said. 

They were cleaning the dishes after they had finished the dinner Dís and Bilbo had prepared with the help of the boys.

Thorin and Dwalin had been in charge of entertaining the children and preparing everything before the moment of opening the gifts arrived.

The children, for their part, were playing on the rug at ‘heroes’. One of them was the hero, another the villain and the other one the kidnapped civilian. It was all very complicated and slightly macabre, as the boys liked to go for realism and often went slightly over the top.

Thorin had played with them a few times, and as weird as it was, it was pretty fun. Frodo made a great villain meanwhile Kíli made the best 'distressed civilian’, faking tears and all.

They were also dressed in their sweaters and looked frankly adorable, when Dís had seen it had awed and cooed at them, making them get together to take a million pictures. 

Thorin looked again at Balin and Bilbo and smiled into his glass of champagne. He had been worried, he would admit, that Bilbo wouldn’t get along with Balin or Dwalin — mostly Dwalin — but it had been the complete opposite. 

Surprisingly Dwalin and he had a morbidly similar sense of humour, even if they went about it in different ways. It could also have been because the first thing Bilbo heard Dwalin say was complimenting his food, but whatever the reason was, Thorin was glad his best friend hadn’t made an idiot out of himself in front of Bilbo.

Balin had looked at him oddly when Thorin had commented two more people would be at the party. He never brought people along and while he had spoken about Bilbo with him before, neither he nor his brother had had the chance to meet him yet. He hadn’t commented on it, though, and Thorin was sure that had been more for his sake than anything else.

Meanwhile, Dwalin had kept giving Thorin suspicious looks the entire week before the party. Thorin doubted he had forgotten about that stupid hand holding comment, he hadn’t brought it up yet but Thorin didn’t doubt it would happen sooner or later, and hopefully — for his own sanity— it would be later…

Dwalin came out of the kitchen mouth stuffed with the cookies he and the children had made the day before.

“So matching sweaters.” Said the asshole Thorin had for a best friend and for a moment he wondered if this wasn’t worse than the hand holding talk.

“The children insisted and it’s a tradition in Bilbo’s family,” Thorin explained, glaring at him.

“ _Right_ ,” Dwalin said, mockingly.

“It is.” Insisted Thorin.

“Of course,” Dwalin said, swallowing the rest of his cookies, with an easy smile that had nothing to do with the mocking look he was sending Thorin.

“Dwalin,” Thorin warned, already knowing it would be in vain.

“I mean, that’s what mates do, right?” Dwalin said with a shrug. “You hold hands and wear matching clothes. Aye, pretty normal.” He wrapped an arm around Thorin and said in a wistful tone, looking at the nothingness, “Don’t you just _really_ miss the times we used to do that? Oh... wait…” He trailed off in mock surprise, slowly turning to look at Thorin, eyes wide and the stupid taunting smile he had on his face giving the whole farce away.

Thorin bit back a sigh and glared at him. “I hate you,” He said with an embarrassed groan. “I hate you _so_ much.”

Dwalin guffawed and Thorin elbowed him on the ribs, not for the first time wondering why he was friends with Dwalin.

  
  


* * *

  
  


“I- I remember him,” said Bilbo quietly, sounding odd .

Thorin looked up at him from where he had been peering fondly at the picture Bilbo and he had taken with the children when they had gone ice skating. It seemed so long ago now, but Thorin sometimes was sure he could still feel the bruises he had gotten from that particular activity…

Thorin drew closer and looked at the picture frame Bilbo was holding, from his shoulder. It was a picture of Joli with the boys. He was holding them up in each of his shoulders, a big smile on his face, his blond short hair standing out against his tan skin. The children were laughing, clearly enjoying being sitting on each of his father’s shoulders.

It was Thorin’s favourite picture of Joli.

“Aye, that one was taken a few months before Joli passes away. It might not look like that but that one is really Kíli.” Thorin said, nodding as he pointed at the chubby boy with long hair that wasn’t nothing more than a toddler — sure Bilbo had been referring to him when he had said that.

“No...” corrected Bilbo, sounding sad. “I meant him,” he added, pointing at Joli in the picture.

Thorin blinked a few times, trying to understand what he had heard. 

“What do you mean?” He asked, feeling a bit faint.

“I remember him...” Bilbo repeated. “He was in one of the book signings I did.”

Thorin’s eyes widened, suddenly remembering the signed collection of the book series he loved.

The books Bilbo had written…

“Oh God...” Thorin quietly uttered. “You met Joli.”

“I-” Bilbo hesitated, licking his lips. Looking as shocked at that notion as Thorin. “It seems I did.”

“You remember him, you said?” Thorin suddenly asked. “How- How come?” He stuttered.

“I- I don’t remember much, but-” Bilbo cut himself off a soft and fond smile taking place on his face. “He was very bright,” Bilbo began again, “his laugh was very loud and he was very big, towering all over me.” Bilbo chuckled a little, gaze focused on the picture. “I remember he was nervous, I found him to be very sweet and well… With his bright and loud looks it was someone very hard to forget...”

Thorin let out a bittersweet laugh at that. He could almost see it, stuttering at Bilbo, telling him how much he loved the books and how nice it was meeting him. 

He could remember it now, the day he had gone to signing, all nervous and eager to meet his favourite author and had come back with a big smile and nothing but praise for the _renown_ Ulotrichous, gushing about how polite and nice he had been even when it had been obvious he hadn’t been that comfortable being there.

Joli had been on cloud nine for weeks after that, and it all had been thanks to Bilbo. Of course the man in question didn’t know anything about that, but knowing he remembered Joli fondly was enough. 

It was incredible to think that even before meeting Bilbo and him had shared some sort of connection through Joli. In a certain way it made their meeting all the more special.

“He liked you a lot.” Commented Thorin, his smile brightening a little.

“He was a very nice man, anyone with eyes could see that. I remember when he entered the shop, everyone turned to look at him, his presence was very bright and he was so tall an- and big!” Bilbo chortled and added, “I suppose that was due to him being a firefighter and all that, he certainly looked strong enough to carry a truck with his bare hands and judging by this picture I’m not entirely wrong.”

Thorin hummed. “He was able to carry Dwalin without much effort.”

Bilbo gaped at him and then let out an incredulous laugh. “Really?!”

“Aye.” Thorin answered, grinning amused at the memory. “There was one time when he-” Thorin began explaining when a voice cut him off.

“Ah!” Kíli cried out. 

Thorin turned to look at him surprised.

“You’re under the mistletoe! You gotta kiss!” Kíli shouted again, bringing everyone's attention to him, while he pointed with his finger at the ceiling on top of Thorin and Bilbo.

Thorin looked up and sure enough, there was a patch of mistletoe tied with a red string and taped to the ceiling.

He shared a baffled look with Bilbo, and reluctantly Bilbo lowered the picture frame and put it back on its place, looking self conscious after noticing everyone looking at them.

Thorin bit back a sigh, they would have to finish their talk another time, it looked like... 

He didn't know why Dís still insisted on putting those things up all over the house when most of the time it was just a family dinner, but she refused to stop and Thorin knew when to give up when it came to his sister.

Thorin groaned, bemoaning the fact that Frerin hadn’t been able to make it to that year's party, he was the best when it came to distracting Dís, and it wasn’t fair Thorin had to be the only one to deal with her, plus the children were always excited to see their wild uncle. 

He turned to look at Bilbo and had to bite his lips to stop himself from smiling like a loon. Bilbo looked like a deer caught in the lights, a slight tinge of red on his cheek — be it from the alcohol of the ale Dwalin and Balin had brought or the embarrassment, Thorin wasn’t sure.

Bilbo looked up and met his gaze and Thorin smiled at him, amused and fond. Bilbo blinked a couple of times, surprise still clinging to his eyes, before he too, smiled.

Feeling his heart hammering wildly against his chest accompanied by an indescribable feeling, Thorin pushed Bilbo’s curls out of his face and slowly bent down a little, giving enough time for him to get away, but he didn’t. He kept smiling and patiently waited until Thorin crossed the distance and carefully pressed his lips on his forehead. Thorin remained like that for a couple of seconds and slowly drew away.

The room was quiet, the radio and the sound of a carol the only things that could be heard in the background. 

Bilbo giggled slightly, cheeks bright red, rubbing against the spot Thorin had kissed. “Your beard tickles.”

Thorin laughed as well, the happiness he felt in that moment making him feel almost faint. “Sorry,” he said, rubbing Bilbo’s forehead with his thumb.

“No! That’s not how it works!” Kíli shouted again. “You aren’t related so you gotta kiss again! The kiss has to be mutual, I’ve seen it in the movies!” Kíli whined, a pout on his face.

Thorin turned to look at him in surprise. It sounded as if he wanted them to kiss on the lips…

He absently wondered what sort of movies Dís was making them watch because he certainly hadn’t seen anything like that with him.

The two other boys were nodding along what Kíli had said and the adults didn’t look that much different. 

Thorin inhaled sharply, readying himself to explain to Kíli that he couldn’t kiss Bilbo on the lips — no matter how much the boy wanted him to — when Bilbo laughed again. Thorin looked at him and noticed his face was a little redder, making his eyes look greener.

“Oh, you lot are all horrible!” He exclaimed, shaking his head and looking almost unable to suppress the fond smile on his face.

Thorin swallowed thickly, his hands itching to go fetch his camera and snap a picture to remember that moment forever.

Suddenly arms were around his neck and Thorin — without even thinking twice — bent down again, closing the distance that separated him from Bilbo. 

Soft and plush lips pressed against his bearded cheek and Thorin’s eyes widened a bit, a delighted smile quickly taking over his face. 

“There, it’s mutual now!” Announced Bilbo, sending them a look that dared anyone to refute him.

Kíli grumbled poutily to himself but didn’t say anything more, turning to go play with his brother and Frodo again.

Thorin, for his part, was left to try to control his racing heart as Bilbo went back to the kitchen to fetch something. 

He wasn’t sure if he would ever get used to being that close to Bilbo, to be able to get kisses and hugs and not feel like his heart might burst out of his chest or that might be about to catch on fire. 

It felt right. Being close to Bilbo and it was almost natural to take his hand to offer comfort or to hug him close when the fluttery feeling Thorin sometimes got became too much, but it was different when it was Bilbo the one who did it, or when they did it for no reason other than doing it. It made Thorin feel special and cared for, in ways he wasn’t aware he could feel.

So yes, being close to Bilbo felt natural and _right_ but that didn’t mean Thorin’s heart was all that ready for when it happened.

Thorin wondered if all new friendships were like that, and when he saw Dwalin walking towards him he thought that, no, there’s no way that was the case. Otherwise, there would be more people around having heart attacks, surely. Thorin was certain.

Dwalin offered him another drink and Thorin took it, sipping at it distractedly. He stood next to Thorin, outside of the range of the mistletoe, but close enough and watched at the direction of the kitchen where Bilbo’s merry voice could be heard. He didn’t say anything, simply smirking at the entrance of the kitchen, but at this point, Thorin really didn’t need him to. 

  
  


**Day 56**

Thorin looked at the asleep children and then at Bilbo, who was just one breath away from doing the same.

He really should have insisted on that nap after lunch…

With a sigh he covered them with a blanket, smiling at the children. Bilbo let out a little hum and smiled sleepily at Thorin, snuggling deeper into the blanket.

Thorin snorted, amused. He brushed a stray curl away from Bilbo’s forehead before saying, “Don’t you fall asleep on me as well. I’m not watching the New Year arrive on my own.”

“Okay,” he said, in nothing more than a whisper.

Thorin put the dishes on the dishwasher and put the water to boil quickly preparing a strong tea for Bilbo and coffee for himself. He came back only to find Bilbo barely blinking the sleep away.

Thorin crouched beside him and bopped him on the nose, making Bilbo blink rapidly startled. “Come on, sleepyhead. I made you tea.”

Bilbo hummed happily and stretched before getting up. Tucking the blanket tighter around the sleeping children. He followed Thorin outside to the backyard where the patio swing had been uncovered and cosied with pillows and blankets for the occasion.

Bilbo climbed on the bench and covered himself with the blankets until only his head could be seen. Thorin snorted and handed him his mug as he sat down as well, covering his lap with another blanket.

Bilbo thanked him and then he said, “It's a pity the children are going to miss the fireworks, but I don’t want to wake them up. They looked really comfortable.”

Thorin hummed in agreement, “They might wake up with the sound of the fireworks.”

“Perhaps,” Bilbo said as he sipped on his tea.

Thorin huddled closer, shivering slightly at the cold breeze. He turned on the radio and waited with Bilbo, as they looked at the stars and heard the faint sounds of fireworks until the countdown began.

Dís had gone back to work and this time they had decided Bilbo’s house would be the one to host the New Years' party, even if it was just the two of them and the children.

It was a quiet but very merry affair, they went to play in the park in the morning and then spent the evening preparing the dinner and watching movies, by the time the late-night had rolled the children were exhausted and so were Bilbo and him.

When the countdown began they counted along with the radio presenter and cheered as the new year began, hugging each other.

“Happy New Year!” Said, Bilbo.

“Happy New Year,” responded Thorin, settling again to watch the fireworks.

Thorin put his arm around Bilbo and let a contented sigh when Bilbo rested his head against Thorin’s shoulder.

Thorin bent down his head and pressed a small kiss on top of the curls, groaning into the curls when he heard the backyard door open, the voice of their nephews following.

“The monsters are up.” Thorin bemoaned loudly, chuckling as he heard Bilbo trying to stifle a laugh.

“You’re so mean.”

Fíli shrieked offended, climbing on the swing and almost making him and Thorin fall down. “We’re not monsters!”

Thorin grabbed him and pulled him on his lap, trickling him. “Yes, you are! Bilbo and I have three little monsters as nephews. Look, you even have horns growing here,” Thorin exclaimed in fake fright, pulling faintly at Fíli’s hair. “And this! Your ears are all pointy!” He added, flicking his very round ears.

“Then you’re the bigger monster! You’re all hairy and big, like a bear!” Frodo shouted, climbing on the swing to ‘attack’ Thorin, Kíli hot on his heels shouting his agreement.

“Bilbo! Help! The little monsters are going to eat me!” Thorin begged exaggeratedly.

“And get eaten as well?! No thank you. You got yourself in this mess, you can get yourself out of it.” Bilbo responded dramatically, covering himself with the blankets until only his eyes — crinkled in amusement — and the top of his head could be seen.

Thorin faked a betrayed gasp and laughed as the children climbed on top of him.

Meeting Bilbo’s eyes he reached for his hand and smiled when he quickly took it under his blanket, warm and soft.

Thorin didn’t know what they were doing anymore, but whatever it was it was the best thing that had ever happened to him.

  
  


**Day 60**

Kíli was aware that adults sometimes weren’t the brightest but this was just stupid. He couldn’t understand how no one else had realized, let alone the ones involved. It was so obvious. 

Why couldn't his uncle, or Bilbo, realize they should just get married?

It was obvious they loved each other, they were just blind. It reminded Kíli of that one time his mom had tried to explain that some people just didn’t want to see what was in front of their eyes, which Kíli honestly thought was just stupid.

He wondered if there was a way he could help. He had seen those movies his uncle and his mom like to watch where with the aid of their friends the couple realized their feelings. Kíli wasn’t sure how he would be able to do that but maybe if he had help, he could pull it off. At least it would be better than not doing anything.

The last time he had tried had been at Christmas when he had tried his uncle to kiss Bilbo on the lips — disgusting, mind you — but worth it. They needed to kiss so they later could get married, that was how it worked, or at least he was pretty sure. Love between grown-ups was something he didn’t really understand that well yet. But he knew Bilbo and Thorin loved each other, they held hands all the time and on New Year he saw them kissing, it wasn’t on the lips but Kíli _knew_ they had kissed with love. 

So he needed a plan. There were too many pros of them being together and getting married, and Bilbo was great so Kíli had to hurry up before the uncle of another kid noticed and tried to steal Bilbo for himself.

So that’s why Kíli announced, “we need a plan”, as soon as Frodo closed the door. They had finally been able to hang out in each other's houses after all the Christmas festivities. Those had been nice but nothing could beat being only with his brother and Frodo in one of their bedrooms playing without being bothered by adults.

“What for?” Asked Frodo.

“Are we doing something?” Asked Fee, confused. 

“I’m not sure yet, depends on what uncle Thorin does,” Kíli explained, a finger on his chin. 

“What is it?” Insisted Frodo, inching closer towards Kíli from where he was sitting on the carpet.

“I’m talking about our uncles dating, obviously,” Kíli said, in a loud whisper, looking at the door, scared for a moment that Thorin would burst in at that moment.

“Oh.” Said Fíli.

“Why would they need to date?” Asked Frodo.

“They like each other, duh.” Responded Kíli, stating the obvious.

“But they are already kind of dating, right?” Asked Frodo, a confused frown on his face and a pout on his mouth. “They hold hands and even kiss all the time. I’m pretty sure that's dating, I’m not sure though.”

“I don’t think so,” Fíli said, deep in thought. “They have never kissed on the mouth and they haven’t said that they love each other yet. Besides, they would have told us if they were actually dating.” Fíli sighed wistfully and added, “it would be nice, though. We could call Bilbo ‘uncle’ as well and maybe they would get married and then you could be our cousin!” 

“Exactly!” Exclaimed Kíli, happy his brother had reached the same conclusion.

Frodo gasped and began jumping excitedly. “I want that too! I want you to be my family!”

“Yeah!” He and Fee shouted, joining in the jumping.

Suddenly Frodo stopped and asked, “but how do we do it?”

“I-” Kíli doubted for a moment before admitting, “well, I don’t know.”

“But what if we ruin things by doing something? They are really close and they obviously like each other but what if us getting in the middle ruins it? The other day mom was watching a movie, the one with the brides,” Fíli said, looking at Kíli to see if he remembered. Kíli did so he nodded. “well, in that movie I think the girl falls in love with someone but then his father pushes her to marry that bloke but she doesn’t want to yet so they break up.” 

Kíli frowned, trying to make sense of what his brother was saying. 

“So if we try to help we might end up making them break up?” Frodo asked.

“Yeah,” Fíli said. “I think so. I didn’t really get the movie so I might be wrong but if I’m right?” He asked, biting his lip nervously.

“I don’t want that,” Kíli said morosely.

He sat down again and looked at his All Might toy and wondered if there was a way they could help his uncle and Bilbo realize they should get married so they could be a family and Frodo could be their cousin forever.

“Then how do we help?” Frodo asked, looking equally sad.

“It would be much easier if uncle Frerin was here. He knows all about love, doesn’t he?” Kíli said with a groan, pissed that once again his uncle wasn’t there to help with another of his plans. “He’s always singing about it so he must...” Kíli concluded.

“Your other uncle is a singer?” Asked Frodo, curiously.

“Yeah, he’s uncle Thorin’s younger brother. He has a rock band.” Explained Fíli. “His band is famous so he travels a lot like mom.”

“Oh, that’s really cool!” Said Frodo. “It’s a pity he’s away.”

“Yeah, wait- Maybe...” Fíli said cautiously. “Maybe if we show them how a great family we can be they will realize it. We already spend most of our time together, we just have to show Bilbo and uncle we can become a family!” Fíli finished, by then almost shouting in excitement.

“Yes! That will work for sure!” Cheered Frodo.

“You’re right, Fee! ”Kíli agreed just as loudly, he was convinced that plan would work, Fíli was very smart. 

Their other plan had also worked after all, and it had gone really well. Frodo had been able to buy a gift for Bilbo while they bought one for Thorin, plus they had been able to be with Bilbo alone for the first time in a while and it had been really fun. He really liked Bilbo and hoped he and Frodo would become part of their family officially soon. 

Kíli wanted to keep Frodo and Bilbo. He didn’t get to keep many things. Dad had died, mom left all the time and his friends never stuck. Only Thorin and Fíli were always there with Kíli, but Frodo and Bilbo were different. 

They never mocked Kíli when he flapped his hands or did things to ground himself, they didn’t mind repeating things for Kíli a few times because he was distracted and never minded that sometimes Fíli got sad about their dad. Frodo got sad sometimes and Bilbo let them both cry, even Kíli. 

He was really nice and warm and always knew what to do to cheer them up after they had cried.

So Kíli wanted to keep them, he wanted to keep having Frodo by his side, playing heroes and drawing with him. 

He wanted to eat Bilbo’s scrummy cookies and get head pats from him and the occasional hug. He wanted to see Thorin smile and smile and laugh like Kíli didn’t usually hear him laugh. He wanted to see Fee cry less and talk about dad more and wanted to see him and Bilbo talk about writing and see him encourage Fíli in writing his own stories. 

Kíli has read them, they are amazing.

He wanted to keep feeling happy and bright, like he belonged, and he would find a way to do that, even if he had to shove Thorin and Bilbo together until they kiss.

Kíli wanted many things but he thought it was okay because Frodo and Bilbo also wanted those things.

He didn’t really need Thorin and Bilbo to marry for that, Frodo and Bilbo were already Kíli’s most important people apart from his blood-related family, but stupid Sara had insisted that unless their uncles were married Frodo couldn’t be their cousin or brother, and all her equally stupid friends had agreed. 

So Kíli would show her, he didn’t need any marriage for them all to be family but if the rest of the world did then he would show them all. 

He would show them that Bilbo and Frodo loved Kíli just as much as he loved them. Kíli would show them how amazing his family was.


	4. Chapter 4

**Day 79**

Fíli was sure he was dying. He hated being sick. 

It wasn’t fair Kíli rarely got sick meanwhile Fíli had to suffer the flu at least once a year.

He was alone at home, his mother was away again and Kíli was at school. 

Thorin had been with him at the beginning but had to leave due to an emergency related to his exhibition. He had almost not gone, worried about Fíli but Fíli knew how important it was, he had heard Thorin and his mother talking about it, so he had insisted he would be fine.

He regretted that decision now. Thorin had said he would be gone for an hour at most and to call him if he felt worse, but the time was passing too slow and Fíli felt really lonely. 

He haphazardly threw the blankets away, instantly starting to shiver. He had been about to call Thorin when he realized he was getting a fever but then quickly changed his mind. Fíli didn’t want to bother him and be the cause of his exhibition going wrong. 

They had gotten better at talking and sharing their problems but this was different. Fíli had to be strong for a little bit more and then he would hog al of Thorin's attention.

His uncle already did so much for them, raising them when his mother was away, he couldn’t ask for more. So he quickly filled a plate with cold water, as he shuddered and his body ached and dipped a towel in it. He got back to his bedroom and laid down putting the wet towel on his forehead, shuddering violently when some of the water trailed down his neck and a bit got inside his ear.

Fíli sniffed pitifully, feeling a headache build as he tried very hard to stop himself from crying. He was hungry but didn’t have any strength to get up. Fíli felt tears trail down his temples and harshly brushed them off.

He felt lonely, he wanted someone with him. He didn’t want to be alone anymore, but he couldn’t call Thorin just yet. Looking at the clock Fíli realized with dread that it had been barely twenty minutes since he had left.

At that moment Fíli wished nothing more than to have his dad with him again. His body trembled with barely contained sobs, he felt so lonely and miserable…

It hurt and he felt horrible. 

“I don’t want to be alone anymore.” Fíli wailed quietly in the loneliness of his bedroom.

He kept on crying until his body couldn’t any more, exhaustion pulling him deep into sleep, his last thought about hoping his uncle would get back home soon.

  
  


* * *

  
  


Fíli woke up to the sound of music and the smell of food. 

He blinked groggily, feeling his mouth dry and throat itchy, his eyes were a bit swollen but at least he didn’t have any tear stains. He found the towel gone and that someone had changed his pillow. 

Fíli got up, wavering on his feet, feeling weak and sore all over, and made his way slowly to the kitchen, waiting to see Thorin preparing the monstrous beverage he gave Fíli whenever he got sick, just the thought making his stomach roll. 

Instead, he found Bilbo, humming along with the music and swaying with it while he stirred something inside a pot.

Fíli watched on for a while in silence, too astonished to say anything.

“Bilbo?” He croaked after he got over his surprise, his voice raspy and sickly.

“Oh, Fíli. You’re awake!” Bilbo said with a smile. “How are you feeling? When I got here you were sleeping.” He motioned towards the pot. “Are you hungry? I’m making chicken soup.”

“Why are you here?” Fíli asked dumbly.

“Your uncle called me as soon as he left, he didn’t want to leave you alone, and good thing he did because it seems the issue it’s not so easy to solve and he’s going to be away for a few hours,” Bilbo explained, adding some spices to the pot.

“So you came?” Fíli asked, padding towards the table, “For me? Wha- What about Frodo?”

Bilbo blinked and stopped stirring the pot. A conflicted look passed across his face and Fíli wasn’t sure how to interpret it. He felt tired and a bit like he was underwater. 

Bilbo walked towards him and helped him sit on a chair. “Of course I came for you Fíli, I care very much about you.” He said softly, petting Fíli’s sweaty hair and planting a kiss on his forehead. “Frodo’s at school. I’ll go pick him up later or if Thorin hasn’t arrived yet, he and your brother will go. I'm not leaving you alone.”

Fíli felt the sudden urge to cry, suddenly all feeling a little too much. He wanted to hug Bilbo and never let go. Since he had woken up sick the only thing he had wanted was for someone to hug him and show him some love.

“You’re also gonna get sick if you get too close,” Fíli said, his lower lip wobbling and tears gathering on his eyes. 

He didn’t want to worry Bilbo by crying but he never minded when Fíli wanted to cry, he was always ready to give him hugs when Fíli wanted to talk about his dad. But this was different, this time he was sick and if he cried maybe Bilbo would think he was hurt somewhere and would worry. Fíli angrily brushed the tears from his face. 

He was such a cry baby.

Suddenly a pair of arms wrapped around him and despite trying his best Fíli couldn’t help but hug Bilbo just as hard. “It’s alright, Fíli. I won’t get sick.”

“But- but what if you do?” Fíli asked, sniffing.

Bilbo pulled away slightly, enough for Fíli to see his face. “Well, if I do, will you take care of me?” He asked.

Fíli instantly nodded. Of course he would, even at the risk of getting sick again, it wouldn’t matter because he cared about Bilb-

Oh.

A new wave of tears spilt from his eyes, and suddenly Fíli was bawling his eyes out, his head burrowing into Bilbo’s shoulder and his trembling arms hugging his neck tightly.

Bilbo cared about him. He had come to take care of Fíli because he _loved_ him.

Of course, Fíli had known that for a while but at that moment the knowledge that Bilbo loved him was overwhelming enough to make him sob. He hated getting sick, he always got sad and started crying, even when he was happy — like in that moment — if it was when he was sick, he ended up crying. 

His mother had explained that it was because he got overwhelmed by his emotions and when he was sick he couldn’t process them very well so the outlet was to cry. Fíli hated it. He felt useless and weak.

“Oh, Fíli. Come here.” Bilbo said, crouching low so he could pull Fíli in another hug. 

He didn’t say anything, he simply rubbed Fíli’s back and held him tight as he cried.

Even with his stuffy nose, he could smell Bilbo’s calming essence, a mix of paper, cinnamon and honey. 

Fíli cried until he ran out of tears, and didn’t let go of Bilbo until he finally calmed down.

“Thank you,” Fíli said, to then grimace slightly at how horrible his voice sounded.

“Of course, my boy,” Bilbo responded, caressing Fíli’s curls one last time. “Now, would you like to eat? The soup must be ready. I’ll give you something for the throat afterwards.” 

“Yes, please,” Fíli said, with a tired but genuine smile.

Bilbo put a plate of mouth-watering soup in front of him, and when Fíli tasted it he hummed in delight. Even with his dimmed sense of taste, the soup was delicious, the noodles soft and the chicken juicy and flavourful. 

Fíli devoured the soup in a matter of minutes and asked for another serving, in the meantime, Bilbo prepared something else. Fíli supposed it was for his throat and he just hoped it didn’t taste as nasty as Thorin’s special beverage. His uncle’s potion of darkness worked really well but it was disgusting to the point Fíli would rather spend another couple of days with a stuffy nose and muggy brain.

Thorin had tried to convince him it wasn’t black magic but Fíli didn’t believe him, that drink tasted too horrible to be anything but.

By the time Fíli finished his soup, exhaustion was pulling at him once again. He wanted to sleep but he also wanted to be a little more with Bilbo, not willing to go to his lonely bedroom, cold and empty without Kee's loud voice in it.

“Come on Fíli, you need to rest.” Urged Bilbo, pulling him towards the sofa. “Drink this,” he said, putting a mug of a sweet-smelling drink on the coffee table in front of Fíli. “I’m going to bring some blankets and pillows.”

Fíli picked the mug and after blowing on it he gave it a cautionary sip.

His eyes widened in surprise. It tasted like his dad’s special ‘Get Better, Feel Better’ tea!

Bilbo came back, two blankets and a bunch of pillows on his arms.

“How did you make this?” Fíli asked, voice full of wonder.

“Oh, I called your mother. I wasn’t quite sure she would pick up but I wanted to know if you had special things you liked to drink or eat when you got sick since Frodo does.” Bilbo explained as he arranged the pillows around Fíli and tucked him with the blankets, one around his shoulders and the other covering his legs. “She mentioned you always asked to have a drink your father used to make but that she wasn’t sure how to make it.” He added.

“Mom had never managed to make it taste the same and dad always kept it as a secret.” Fíli mentioned.

“I asked her about what she remembered and it turns out it’s similar to a drink my own father used to make. I tried to make it as close as what Dís described. Do you like it?” Asked Bilbo, sitting down next to Fíli on the sofa.

“I do! It’s not exactly the same as dad’s but it tastes delicious. Thank you, Bilbo.” Fíli said, hugging him and cuddling next to him.

“I’m glad you like it.” Bilbo put his hand on Fíli’s forehead and said, “I’m glad your fever is gone.”

Fíli tensed slightly and bit his lip nervously. He had completely forgotten about it. 

It had been Bilbo then, the one that removed the wet towel and the soaked pillow.

“Why didn’t you call your uncle? I know he gave you some medicine before leaving but fevers can be dangerous.” 

“I didn’t want to worry him, besides his exhibition is really important,” Fíli explained, quietly.

“I know Fíli, but what if you hadn’t gotten better, or if I hadn’t come? You would be all alone with a burning fever. Thorin would have arrived only to find you very sick. He would have most likely had to take you to the hospital.” Bilbo explained, putting his arm around Fíli. “That would have worried him even more than getting a call from you telling him you were feeling worse. And you know you can always reach me, Fíli. You know you don’t have to do everything on your own.”

Fíli hadn’t thought about that. He just didn’t want to be a burden, he hadn’t even thought about what would happen if he got worse. 

“I’m sorry. I will call you next time. I just didn’t want to burden my uncle. He already has to raise us.” Fíli explained.

“You’re not a burden Fíli. Your uncle loves you very much, he was the one who chose to take care of you, and for what I’ve been told he already took care of you before your dad passed away. He does it because he wants to. Because he loves you and your brother. You could never be a burden.”

Fíli knew that. Thorin had always said the same thing but sometimes Fíli felt really insecure and doubted Thorin's words, thinking that maybe he only said that for his sake. 

“Okay.” He said, snuggling closer to Bilbo. “Thank you for being here.”

“Of course,” Bilbo replied with a hum, giving Fíli’s arm a squeeze. “Now, how about watching some TV until your uncle, Frodo and your brother arrive? I already wrote to Thorin and he and your brother are going to go pick him up before coming here.” 

Fíli brightened, even through his exhaustion. “Yes!”

They watched a rerun of an old All Might movie and as Bilbo chose another movie for them Fíli felt himself fall asleep. 

For once, Fíli realized, he didn’t mind that much being sick. With Bilbo by his side, it didn’t feel as bad and he couldn’t wait for his brother to come back

He snickered slightly, Kee would be so jealous Fíli had gotten Bilbo all for himself. 

And as he finally drifted off to sleep his last thought was that his dad would have really liked Bilbo.

  
  


**Day 81**

Bilbo entered the building, fidgeting nervously with the hem of the waistcoat Thorin had gifted him, Frodo’s hand the only thing that kept him from bolting through the door. 

“Are you nervous, uncle?” Inquired Frodo.

“A bit.” Admitted Bilbo.

It was the first time he was at a photography exhibition and one where a picture of him would actually be _in_ the exhibition.

At the time he hadn’t even paid much attention, quickly accepting when Thorin had asked him if he could add a picture of Bilbo to the exhibit. Bilbo, very foolishly, had felt incredibly flattered, and like an idiot had said yes without much thought, thinking he would be just another face among the many Thorin was going to display on the gallery.

Thorin had been adamant in keeping the theme and the finer details of his exhibition secret until the last moment, only talking about it vaguely. It hadn’t been until the day before that Bilbo had found out the topic of the exhibit. 

It was ‘unique beauty’.

So Bilbo was nervous. Hardly his fault, it was a little daunting to know that you would be in a famous exhibition from a famous photographer, in a famous gallery. 

It was the kind of attention Bilbo had always wanted to avoid, hence the reason for the use of a pseudonym and how rarely he did public appearances or book signs. 

But no time for that. It was Thorin’s special day and he had to be supportive because if Bilbo was nervous then Thorin was a trainwreck, he realized as he saw the man anxiously pace in a secluded area of the entrance. They still had a good fifteen minutes before the gallery opened its doors to the public but there was already a good queue at the entrance.

Thorin was with the boys and Dís, nervously combing back his wavy hair with his fingers.

Bilbo and Frodo walked towards him, and when Thorin spotted them he looked even more nervous, if possible.

Bilbo hurried his pace and Frodo let go of his hand to run towards his friends. 

“Are you alright?” Asked Bilbo, straight to the point, not even bothering with pleasantries. 

“Ah, well. Not really.” Thorin said, walking closer to him, and taking his hand and holding it in a death grip. “I don’t know why. This is my fifth exhibition and I’ve never been so nervous, not even the first one.”

“Oh, Thorin. It’ll be fine, you’re incredibly talented and everyone knows it. You see beauty where not many people do, and that’s the topic of this exhibit, right?” Bilbo asked, rubbing his thumb along the back of Thorin’s hand, feeling him relax momentarily. “You want to show the world what you see. I think that’s incredible, and I know everyone is going to love it.”

Thorin slowly pulled him into a warm hug, holding Bilbo close. “Thank you.” He whispered in his ear, his warm breath making Bilbo shudder slightly. “You’re right, I’ve to trust in myself. I spent almost half a year planning this. It’ll be okay.” He said, taking a deep breath and pulling away from the hug. 

Bilbo looked at him and fixed his hair, combing through the soft wavy strands of raven hair. He put a hand on his cheek and said, “You look very handsome.”

Thorin smiled at him, looked more relaxed and calm. “Thank you, you too.” He added, looking at Bilbo’s waistcoat with a more animated grin. “Frodo was right, it looks very good on you.”

Bilbo’s cheeks flushed at the praise, but before he could say anything on of the people who Thorin worked along came and interrupted them. 

“Thorin, it’s time.” The man said, before leaving quickly, after Thorin had nodded at him, to talk to another person.

Bilbo pulled Thorin into another hug, taking a deep breath and feeling Thorin do the same. “Good luck,” Bilbo told him, feeling infinitely more relaxed than he had when he had arrived.

Thorin bumped their foreheads together playfully, making Bilbo huff in amusement, before taking his leave as well.

Bilbo watched him go and enter the gallery before he joined Dís and the children.

After quickly exchanging greetings with them, they waited for the gallery to finally open. It was rare, Bilbo knew, that a gallery did a special opening for an exhibit. That didn’t happen unless you were a well-known artist and Bilbo knew — without an iota of doubt — that Thorin was the best.

  
  


* * *

  
  


Bilbo wasn’t quite sure what he had expected to see on the exhibit, but whatever it had been could have never been able to compare to what Bilbo was seeing.

When he had heard about the theme Bilbo had thought there would be more people in it, much like those close up pictures of those children with unbelievable eyes that lived in remote places.

He had been mistaken.

So far Bilbo had seen half of the exhibit and not a single human was captured in the pictures. 

Thorin had explained, when he had given his speech and thanks to his sponsors, that the central picture of the exhibit was at the very end. He had said that that picture was the most special one for Thorin since it symbolized many things for him.

Bilbo was eager to see it, to know what Thorin found the most beautiful. He had already known what the inspiration of the exhibit had been, Thorin had explained it to him, he wanted to show people that all things had a certain beauty on them, even those that were often overlooked. 

Thorin wanted to show everyone how he saw it, how he could find meaning and beauty in everything he photographed. 

So far he had seen marvellous pictures, they were all beautiful and brought all sorts of sentiments in Bilbo. It was strange, they were mundane things, much like Thorin had said but the way he had captured them made Bilbo see them in ways he had never done before.

This was how Thorin saw the world around him, and it was beautiful.

Bilbo stopped in front of a picture of dandelions, the sun blazing on top of them and a few snowflakes covering them, casting an almost magical shadow. They were fluffy and healthy, but that wasn't what made Bilbo stop. It was the teasing of a watering can that was on the right side of the picture, clearly meant to be seen.

Bilbo knew that watering can!

It was Frodo's.

With a gasp, he quietly realized that that picture had been taken from his garden. He could remember it now when it had happened.

It had been a day that had heavily snowed and Thorin had brought the boys to Bilbo’s house for the weekend. 

He had stayed for a while and had gone with Frodo to shovel some of the snow that had piled up in the backyard. Bilbo had later found them taking pictures at his and Frodo’s garden. Thorin had mentioned that the dandelions were cute and Bilbo had complained about them, mentioning that they were nothing more than weeds that took up space and kept competing with his tomatoes.

Bilbo looked in awe at the picture and then guffawed when he read the label of the picture, the title said.

**_Blasted weeds._ **

That was exactly what Bilbo had called them. Now he felt slightly bad for having gotten rid of them, they were quite beautiful.

Bilbo grinned so hard it almost hurt. Thorin was a great photographer.

“Is that my watering can?” Frodo asked when he came with the rest of the Durins in tow. He then gasped. “Uncle! Those are the dandelions that were in our garden!”

“Yes.” Bilbo agreed, laughing again. “Yes, they are.”

“But those are beautiful!” Frodo said perplexed, making Bilbo laugh even harder. “How did he do that?” Frodo peered into the picture closer, as if trying to decipher the secret that made it so gorgeous. “Thorin is amazing.” He said, voice full of wonder.

Bilbo nodded, his heart filled to the brim with an indescribable feeling. “Yes, he is.” He said as he watched Thorin greeting people from the other side of the room. 

The time quickly passed, as they made their way around the exhibition. Bilbo and the Durins, but mainly Dwalin and Balin, recognizing where the pictures were taken. 

They finally reached the end of the exhibit and around the corner was the last picture, and so far Bilbo hadn’t had the time to talk to Thorin just yet. He had been expecting it, as the opening day it was a busy day, many people had gone and Thorin, like it or not, had to talk to them to promote his work. If he was lucky many would buy a few of his pieces that very same day, and Bilbo had an inkling that would be the case. 

He had seen it. The way Thorin’s photos affected people. He had seen an elderly lady cry at a picture where a ladybug was perched on top of a chewed pencil, and seen almost everyone laugh and watch in awe at the picture of the dandelions.

“Thorin has really outdone himself this time,” Dís said, as they watched the last picture before the central one. The empty chrysalis of what must have been a butterfly on the corner of a dumpster.*

“I wonder what the central picture is,” Bilbo questioned out loud.

He hadn’t seen any picture with his face on it, but again there weren't any people in any of the pictures. Maybe Thorin had simply decided not to use it. It was slightly disappointing since he had already been looking forward to it, but at the same time it was a relief, Bilbo had no issues with his looks but he was well aware that he was far from being the most photogenic person out there. 

Still, he had seen a few people looking oddly at him. Bilbo had thought that it was because they had recognized him from one of the pictures, but Bilbo was beginning to think there was another reason for that. As he smoothed down his waistcoat, he just hoped it wasn’t because of how he was dressed or anything of the sort.

“Come on! Let’s keep going.” Urged Frodo. “I wanna see the last picture, Thorin said it was the prettiest.”

Frodo hurried, turning one of the fake walls that separated the exhibit like a maze. Fíli and Kíli ran after him. 

Bilbo chuckled with Dís, listening to the children bicker and giggle and then one moment later, they cut themselves off and all sound of their mayhem disappeared. 

Dís and he shared a surprised and slightly confused gaze. 

“Frodo?” Called Bilbo, getting no response. 

Looking more alarmed Dís also called her children, getting no response either. Bilbo felt dread tickle his back and quickly followed the path the kids had taken, Dís by his side.

“Children? Where-” Bilbo called, and as he turned a corner — on the other side of the wall where they had previously been before — were the lads. “Oh, there you are! Why didn't’ you-”

Before Bilbo could finish that question Frodo cut him off, pulling on the hem of his waistcoat and pointing at the wall he said, “Uncle, look!”

Bilbo, mouth still open to keep reprimanding him, looked at what Frodo had pointed and promptly lost all ability to speak.

His mouth kept moving but Bilbo wasn’t even sure what he was trying to say. He let out a shuddering breath as he finally closed it.

Bilbo looked at the picture that was in front of him, observing every detail, trying to understand what he was seeing. 

If the one that was in the picture was really him.

The central picture. The one Thorin had said to be the most beautiful of them all. 

It was a picture of Bilbo.

The first one he ever took of him. On the day Bilbo had declared him his friend after Thorin graciously had taken Bilbo to his favourite and secret place.

Bilbo took a deep breath, coming out shaky and absently felt someone take his hand.

He looked beautiful.

It was almost surreal, watching himself like that. He was laughing, a couple of sparrows captured in picture mid-flight. Bilbo could recognize the absolute joy in his face and absently wondered if he always looked like that when he was with Thorin.

He hoped he did because just by looking at himself laughing like that Bilbo felt automatically smiling.

It was right there when he finally came to terms with the fact that this picture was the centrepiece of the exhibit. 

He was the central piece! 

And just as quickly as he had found himself unable to speak, tears gathered in his eyes. It was stupid, Bilbo didn’t even know why he was crying, he didn’t want to cry. He was happy and yet…

The tears fell down his cheeks, a grin on his face and small bursts of laughter came from his lips. 

“Oh my god,” Dís said with a gasp, a hand covering her mouth.

“Bilbo?” Asked a voice from behind him, a voice Bilbo could recognize anywhere.

He turned to find Thorin looked at him, a worried frown on his face and a nervous smile on his mouth. His left hand was closed in a tight fist, Bilbo noticed.

Bilbo walked towards him, tears finally having stopped, and wrapped his arms around Thorin’s middle, burrowing his head into his neck.

Thorin instantly hugged him back, a sigh of relief leaving his mouth.

“You don’t mind?” Thorin asked, nuzzling Bilbo’s temple.

“Not at all,” Bilbo responded, chuckling wetly. “Thank you,” Bilbo adds, after a moment.

“I should be the one thanking you. I doubt this exhibit had gone as well as it did if you hadn’t been with me all these months.” Thorin whispered as he drew away.

“Don’t be silly, this is all thanks to how hard you’ve worked. You have talent and dedication and that’s what makes you a great artist.”

Thorin didn’t say anything for a while, and absently Bilbo noticed that Dís and the children weren’t there anymore. 

A few moments later Thorin asked, quietly, “did you like it?”

“I loved it.” Responded Bilbo.

For a while, they remained like that, wrapped into each other's arms but didn’t say anything else, not really needing to, and soon enough they went to meet with the rest.

For now, that was enough... 

For now, the feel of Thorin’s hand clasped on his own and his sweet smile and even sweeter laughter were enough.

  
  


**Day 85**

“Uncle?” Frodo asked.

“Yes?” Bilbo said as he turned from where he was dusting the bookcases. It was cleaning day and us much Bilbo would be rather doing anything else, he couldn’t let the dust settle in more. The other day he had reached for the highest shelf and while at it he had seen the top of the bookcase, almost screeching after seeing how much dust and dirt had piled up plus the couple of dead moths he found on top of it.

“Have you ever fallen in love?” Frodo questioned, as he carefully cleaned the knick-knacks that usually adorned their living room. 

Frodo, as always, was happy to lend a hand and help Bilbo clean or tidy up. He just hoped that willingness lasted and didn’t die a horrible death when Frodo became a teenager.

The question made him pause, and for a moment Bilbo wondered if he would have to deal with Frodo’s puberty long before what he had hoped, but no, that would be absurd, he wasn’t even eight. It was far too soon.

Bilbo hopped off from the chair he was using as a ladder and picked another cleaning cloth, sitting down beside Frodo on the sofa and helping him clean a few of the things. 

“Why?” He asked. “You’ve never asked about anything like this before.” Bilbo hesitated for a moment, while he grimaced internally, before adding, “Have you found someone you think you might love?”

He wasn’t ready for this. It felt too soon. Would he have to give Frodo the talk about the birds and the bees? He fiercely hoped not…

“No! It’s just- How do you know you love someone? How does it feel?” Frodo huffed exasperatedly. “I mean- What do you even do with people you love?”

Bilbo realized at that moment how stupid he had been. While he had focused on many aspects of Frodo’s emotional development — particularly in teaching him how to express his emotions and healthily deal with them. And lord! hadn’t that been difficult at the beginning — especially when Bilbo himself barely knew how to do that. 

He now realized had neglected an important part of those emotions — romantic love. Bilbo hadn’t deemed it important as Frodo was still young and since he already knew how platonic love worked he had thought in time it would be easy for him to discern the difference. 

Terribly stupid of him, he realized now. 

Frodo, much like Fíli, had plenty of trouble when it came to dealing with his emotions and even more when it came to recognizing new ones. How could Bilbo expect him to recognize the feel of falling in love when he had never talked to him about it. 

Very stupid indeed…

“Well, falling in love is a complicated thing.” Bilbo began explaining. He exhaled loudly. “Most of the time you don’t choose who you fall in love with and many a time you don’t even realize you’re falling in love, until much much later!”

Bilbo stifled a laugh when Frodo’s face took into an alarmed expression as if what Bilbo had just told him had been incredibly outrageous. 

“Don’t look like that! It’s not as different as the love you share with family or friends, you know? — It’s still love, after all.” Bilbo explained, patting one of Frodo’s hands.

“But how do you know the difference? How do you know you are _in_ love with someone?” Frodo asked, looking even more worried, if possible.

Bilbo was starting to think that there was something more apart from simple curiosity.

“Well, I would say that the main difference is what connection you want to have with that person, or people if you love more — don’t worry about that for now, we’ll just focus on one for now.” Bilbo tried to explain, but judging by Frodo’s confused expression he wasn’t doing such a good job at it.

“Let's see..." Bilbo tried again. "Look at it like this. With your friends you want to have fun and, while you want to be special to them, you don’t mind they also have other friends, right?” Bilbo asked. Once Frodo nodded Bilbo continued. “Well, in a romantic relationship you want to have a special connection with them, something no one else can have. You want to be special to that person in a way no one else can.”

“But how do you do that? And in what way? This is very confusing, uncle.” Frodo exclaimed, a frustrated pout on his face.

“I know, duck. Love is confusing, that’s why many people don’t realize they are feeling until much much later.” Bilbo said as he petted Frodo’s soft curls. “When you’re in love you feel everything for that person very intensely. You want to hold their hand, be close to them, sometimes even kiss them. Being close to them — like no one else is — makes you happy. Much like Sam’s parents, do you remember how close they were?”

Bilbo deeply regretted not having a closer example to give to Frodo, coincidentally all the grown-ups they knew were either single or widowed and wasn’t that a bit sad? Of course, it wasn’t anybody’s fault, that was how life was sometimes but still… Bilbo ough to make some friends with the rest of the parents in Frodo’s school, if nothing else so they could avoid these situations. 

Frodo was starting to get on better with his classmates, maybe he could invite one or two of them to their house…

“Oh! So just like you and Thorin!” Frodo exclaimed with a smile that quickly turned into confusion once again. “But wait, you’re not together but- but you love each other! Why aren’t you together?” He asked, cocking his head to the side.

Bilbo meanwhile had been left in an almost catatonic state when his nephew had exclaimed the first sentence. He tried to articulate a response, something, _anything_ that wasn’t the dying sound that was about to leave his mouth.

“Thorin and I are friends!” Bilbo finally said, in a shrill and croaky voice, sounded almost desperate even to his own ears.

“But Fee and Kee are my friends too and we don’t do what you do with Thorin.” Frodo countered, then with a sad frown and almost hesitant, he asked, “does- does that mean you don’t love Thorin?”

By the end of the question, Frodo was looking at Bilbo as if he had betrayed everything Frodo had ever believed in. As if he was seeing Bilbo in a new light for the first time and what he had found was disappointing. 

Sort of unfair, and very overly dramatic, not that he could fault him. Frodo was Baggins after all, but still…

It wasn’t a look that Bilbo liked seeing on his young face, and felt even worse to be on the receiving end of it. 

But despite everything, even in the worst moments, Bilbo had never lied to Frodo, it had been something he had promised himself he would never do when he adopted him. He might omit some things for his own good and due to his young age but Bilbo never outwardly lied to him, even less when Frodo asked delicate questions, like the one he had just asked. 

This time would not be different, even if Bilbo himself wasn’t quite sure about the answer. 

His feelings for Thorin were something he prefered not to entertain too much. Afraid of — well, of many things — preferring to let himself get carried away by the moment, enjoying said moments as he enjoyed Thorin’s company. 

It was easy, not to think about it when being close to Thorin felt so natural, so easy to just hug him and take his hand and let himself be kissed by that sweet mouth and not think about what all of that meant. 

They had never kissed each other on the mouth or done things that were on the other side of _lovers_ — as asinine that word sounded. It had been better to just let it fall into the category of friendship, even if it wasn’t really the case. No friends kissed each other so tenderly, it didn’t matter it hadn’t been on the lips. 

The way Thorin had held his hand and brushed his lips across them held more significance than any other french kiss Bilbo had ever received before. They were in a limbo between friends and - and _something,_ and that was the thing, he didn’t know where they stood or what he wanted, and that scared him so Bilbo simply didn’t acknowledge it. 

But the reason why he let it stay that way, for now, was because he was keenly aware it was the same for Thorin. They might have not known each other for long but Thorin had opened up to him with the same ease Bilbo had opened up to him, so while he still had plenty to learn about Thorin he was sure of this. 

Thorin was as unsure and scared — dare he say — as Bilbo was. It had happened fast, too fast, and after spending so much time alone it was hard to get used to the idea that he might have found someone who could fill a void Bilbo had ignored for too long.

But despite all his confusing feelings and even more confusing approach towards them Bilbo still had to be honest with Frodo, he wouldn’t allow himself anything else, it didn’t matter how hard or difficult the topic, he owed the lad that at the very least.

“I do,” Bilbo admitted, for the first time out loud, heart hammering on his chest. Elation and the ting of fear and adrenaline circling his veins in an addictive way. “I love him very much.” He said again, slightly breathless.

He inhaled deeply, trying to calm his racing heart.

“But it’s not that simple. Loving someone doesn’t mean you have to be together, nor does it mean that you are _in_ love with that person.” Bilbo continued, not really sure what he was trying to explain Frodo at this point.

“But you’re in love with Thorin, right?” Frodo asked, a worried frown on his brown, he even leaned closer to peer at Bilbo. “You’re happy with him, I have seen it!” He added, almost accusingly.

“I-” Bilbo hesitated for a moment, “I am.” He admitted before he could chicken out.

“Then you should tell him!” Frodo shouted, looking immensely happy and satisfied with himself, and now- now that Bilbo was looking closely he could spot the glint of mischievousness sometimes Frodo had on his eyes when he was planning something Bilbo might not approve. “I’m sure he loves you too! Who wouldn’t? You’re the best uncle, and make the best food and give the best hugs, and- and-” Frodo rapidly rambled breathlessly and shaking slightly in his excitement, almost as if he would take off and go flying any moment now.

Bilbo hugged him, pressing Frodo against his chest and took deep breaths sure that the boy would feel them and would follow Bilbo. “Breathe,” he said, with an amused chuckle, just to make sure. 

The last thing they needed was him hyperventilating because he had gotten too excited. It had happened before and it wasn’t fun or an experience Bilbo wanted to repeat. Frodo took deep breaths for a little while and once he had calmed down Bilbo let him go. 

“Thank you Frodo, I also think you’re very lovable,” Bilbo said, pecking the boy on the forehead.

That had been another thing Bilbo had to get used to, or more like had forced himself to get used to. Physical affection was not something that came easy to Bilbo, but after adopting Frodo he had read it was a must. Many children thrived from physical and verbal affection and by God Bilbo would give his nephew plenty of both. 

“Are you gonna?” Frodo asked, his fingers brushing softly against where Bilbo had kissed him.

“Gonna what?” Bilbo asked playing dumb and hoping Frodo wouldn’t insist.

“Tell Thorin you love him, duh!” 

No such luck then...

Bilbo sighed and said, “I don’t know if it’s the right time, just yet, Frodo.”

“For you or him?” Asked Frodo, surprising Bilbo. “He obviously loves you and he’s already said it to everyone!” 

“What? What do you mean?” Bilbo asked, feeling faint.

“In the exhibition. He said the most beautiful pic was the centrepiece and also the one that meant the most to him. It was your picture so obviously, you’re the one that means the most to him, and he thinks you’re beautiful.” Frodo explained as if Bilbo was a bit slow and too dumb to understand, and considering the topic and the circumstances, Bilbo felt a bit like that. “He’s already told you he loves in front of so many people, so when are _you_ gonna tell him?”

Bilbo was once again left speechless by his young nephew, not really sure what to say.

After a while, Frodo sighed with a pout and spoke again. “It’s okay if you’re not ready yet. Mrs Willow said that sometimes we need time to voice some feelings and that that’s okay, but that we should think about it, it’s not healthy to store them and- and-” Frodo scrunched his nose, brows furrowed deep in thought “Oh yeah! It’s not good to brush them away, all feelings must be acknowledged.” Frodo nodded to himself, looking quite proud about having remembered what his therapist had told him. 

“She also said some feelings don’t need to be voiced but I think this one isn’t one of them. You taught me to show love and you’re always telling me how much you love me, so you have to do the same for Thorin, okay? Your love makes me feel really happy so I think you can make Thorin very happy as well.” Frodo added, giving Bilbo a toothy grin. 

“Alright, I’ll think about it,” Bilbo said, incredibly impressed to see how far his nephew had come. “Thank you, Frodo.”

Bilbo exhaled, the pride he felt for Frodo almost overwhelming. The lad had come far from the withdrawn and terrified boy he had been when he had been discharged from the hospital. It was nice to know all the effort Bilbo had put had served for something. 

What Frodo had said was true, Bilbo made sure to tell Frodo how much he loved him every single day, at the very least once. He needed him to understand that, to understand that he was very much loved and needed, that showing love was okay and that he wasn’t alone. 

He wanted for Frodo — once he was old and had lived an entire life — to look back and remember Bilbo as someone who had loved him, and to remember his childhood with happiness and not sorrow.

Raising Frodo wasn’t always easy, many times Bilbo had gone to sleep almost in tears, exhaustion clinging to his very bones when the boy was attacked by night terrors, wondering if he was doing the right thing. If he was what Frodo really needed— if what he was doing was enough…

Bilbo still didn’t know the answer to that but he kept trying his best every single day because all the little things made it worth it. The smiles, the laughter and the way he slowly saw Frodo flourish into the magnificent boy Bilbo knew he was.

All of it made it worth it.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The final part!  
> 

**Day 98**

“I’m starting to think this wasn’t such a great idea,” Bilbo said, as he huffed, red-faced, holding his luggage and a moody Frodo trailing after him.

“You think?” Thorin asked with an annoyed grimace, as he tried to balance Kíli on his arms and their bags while Fíli hung onto his coat half asleep.

“Why did we accept again?” Asked Bilbo, climbing the stairs to their floor. 

Go figures the day they get to the hotel it would be broken.

“Because my sister is evil and made it seem like a fantastic idea, _and_ made sure to suggest it in front of the children so we wouldn’t be able to say no.” 

Thorin was still bitter about that.

“I had forgotten how horrible it is to travel with children. This resort better be as good as the bloody pamphlet advertised.” Bilbo grumbled.

Thorin couldn’t fault him, he had been very close to stabbing his ears on their way. 

He had been hoping the lads would fall asleep since they departed at four in the stupid morning but of course that hadn’t been the case, they had been talking the whole trip, insisting in playing horrible songs and making it impossible for neither Bilbo nor him to sleep during their respective breaks from the wheel.

Ten minutes before they finally arrived they had decided that they were tired enough to finally sleep. Thorin had to squash the urge to put on heavy metal at top volume and wake up the little monsters that were their nephews, only the reassurances from Bilbo that at least now they were quiet and the fact that if he woke them up he would have to deal with them in a bad mood, stopped him from actually doing it.

“What I can’t believe is that it took us almost an entire day to arrive here. We departed early!” Thorin scoffed and sighed exhausted when one of the bags broke loose from his hold and rolled down the stairs. Thorin bitterly glared at it until it hit the bottom. 

For a moment he considered leaving it there. Did he really need to change clothes in those three days they were going to be there? He was sure he could make a do with the ones he was wearing...

Bilbo made the decision for him and climbed down the stairs but instead of bending down to pick it up, he gave it a well-placed kick to make it roll up again. Frodo giggled a little from where he had been left midway. “I don’t know, it wasn't even sunrise when we left my house,” Bilbo said with a grunt as the bag started rolling down again and hit him on the legs. 

It probably hit him on the shins, Thorin thought but didn’t make an effort to help the man. As far as he was concerned that bag was Bilbo’s now.

“What do you have here? Rocks?” Bilbo asked groaning as he kicked the bag again, this time with more strength, almost pettily. 

“Ah, right,” Thorin exclaimed, trying to rub his right eye with his shoulder, jostling Kíli slightly. “My snowboard it’s there.”

“Your what?” Bilbo asked, finally reaching them. He sighed, shaking his head. “Come carry your bloody bag!” He demanded, kicking the bag one last time and glaring tiredly at Thorin.

With a defeated sigh Thorin bent down and picked the bag again, almost making fall Fíli in the process, who had fallen asleep against Thorin’s arm, still standing.

“M’ fine!”Fíli shouted, looking wildly around him. 

Thorin snorted and raised his hand to pat the boy on the back, only to realize it was full of bags. Right. He lowered it again and said, “come on, I’m not spending the night on the sodding stairs.”

Frodo giggled again. 

A few minutes — more like days, thought bitterly Thorin — they made it to their room and Thorin placed the slowly awaking Kíli on the king-sized bed and threw himself, face first, on the single size one beside it.

He was drenched in sweat from climbing the stairs packed like a mule and knew he was in a dire need of a bath — as were the children and Bilbo — but let himself enjoy a moment of rest.

Thorin finally felt himself relaxing and then, all of a sudden, something poked sharply against his side. 

“Get up you big oaf. I’m not bathing the gremlins on my own.” Bilbo said.

“Make them do it alone, they’re big enough,” responded Thorin, his voice muffled against the pillow.

“They’re half asleep, if I let them go alone they’re gonna brain themselves and I refuse to spend the night in the hospital.” Bilbo poked him again. “Get up!” 

“No, don’t wanna...” Whined Thorin, burrowing his head under the pillow.

“Oh, for the lords! You giant baby!” Bilbo shouted, huffing. 

Thorin didn’t respond and for a second he thought Bilbo had finally given up, he hadn’t heard any steps leaving but maybe if he waited another minute he would go and-

Thorin huffed as all the air left him and a great weight fell on top of him, pushing the air out of him.

He pulled the pillow away from his face and craned his neck to look at his back where Bilbo had laid sprawled face-up, legs hanging from the edge of the bed. 

“You need to get up, otherwise I’m not getting up either and you’re going to die suffocated.” Bilbo threatened, wiggling around seemingly to find a more comfortable position. 

“I have carried heavier, your threats don’t scare me,” Thorin countered, and pushed himself slightly, with Bilbo still on top, to prove it. He met his gaze, by craning his neck backwards until it almost hurt, and raised an eyebrow cheekily.

Bilbo jostled slightly and let out a yelp and half-muffled scream let his mouth, as he glared at Thorin, looking at the pillow that was closer to him in consideration, almost as if he was considering suffocating Thorin to death with it, himself.

But before he could say anything Thorin heard a few giggles, and that was the only warning he got before more weight was added on top of him. The laughter of children bouncing around the room. 

Thorin grunted as he laid squashed on the mattress by four people.

Bilbo let out a breathless laugh above him and hissed a little, most likely after having a knee or elbow jammed into a soft place. Children were surprisingly pointy.

“Surrender, great evil-doer!” Shouted Kíli.

“The Small Might squad has arrived!” Frodo joined.

“Your reign of terror is over, you must bath now!” Fíli added dramatically.

Thorin laughed as best as he was able with the weight of one adult and three children on top of him, exhaustion still clinging to him but his bad mood finally gone.

“Do you yield, oh, great evildoer?” Asked Bilbo mockingly.

Thorin snorted and said, “Aye, aye. You got me, great heroes. You have won the great fight against germs and sweat.”

The children cheered and scrambled off, looking as if they had never been tired in the first place. 

Thorin envied them.

Bilbo got up as well and offered a hand to Thorin. A peace offering. 

He took it, and pulled hard, almost bringing Bilbo back on top of him and laughed as Bilbo swatted him on the back. 

With a sigh, he finally got up and sighed at the loss of the soft mattress beneath him.

“They look awake enough,” Thorin said grumpily, pointing at the children that were already rummaging in their bags to look for fresh clothes.

“Oh, shush.” Bilbo dismissed, turning towards the bathroom. “I’m running the bath, much easier than washing them one by one.”

Thorin took out his coat, shoes and sweater. And entered the bathroom in a short-sleeved t-shirt and his jeans. 

In the end, the steam of the bath got rid of the last remains of fogginess that exhaustion brought, the bath was quick but messy, Thorin on the receiving end of splashes and bubbles thrown around.

“Stay here and take a shower, you’re sopping wet,” Bilbo said when Thorin made a move to follow them to the room after emptying the bath, leaving fresh clothes on top of the sink and closing the door after him.

Thorin gladly took the offer and enjoyed his shower, glad he wouldn’t have to deal with making the boys put on some cream before they dressed up and that they brushed their hair, in weather like this it was a must, more so now, that they were near the mountains in mid-February.

Thorin washed his hair and thought of how quickly Christmas had come and gone, his exhibition as well. It had been a great success, as stressing as it had been planning it, and Thorin felt really proud. It had been the best he had done to the date.

They hadn’t talked about it yet. Him and Bilbo… About the exhibit and the whole thing about Thorin putting Bilbo’s picture as the centrepiece. 

It was alright, though. Thorin wasn’t too worried. He knew Bilbo had been happy about it and Thorin had felt proud to be able to show everyone what Bilbo meant to him.

Dwalin and Dís had teased him about it relentlessly but it had been worth it, when he had first taken the picture he had known Bilbo was special and being able to have tangible proof of the impact he had had on Thorin’s life was something cherished deeply. 

Out of all the pieces that one had been the one Thorin had been unwilling to sell, no matter how many people asked for it. That one was just for him and had simply borrowed it for the exhibition.

Thorin was pretty sure what he felt for Bilbo was mutual, they had never explicitly addressed it but Thorin had never felt the need, once and every time Bilbo had proven to him — by never pulling away from him and being honest and his true self whenever he was with Thorin. 

So it was okay, Thorin didn’t mind waiting. Everything had happened very naturally but it still had been in a very short amount of time and Thorin wasn’t in any hurry. He was happy with what he had with Bilbo, even if sometimes he couldn’t help but _want more._

He had already made his move, now it was Bilbo’s turn to take the next step.

Thorin got out of the shower, a shirt and a pair of sleeping pants covering his body, Bilbo quickly entering to take one as well. 

He towelled his hair and found his nephews munching on a piece of the banana cake Bilbo had made — along with other things — for the trip while they watched some cartoons on the TV. 

Thorin had thought it a bit excessive at the time but now he felt grateful for it. Bilbo had insisted it was that or junk food and Thorin didn’t even want to think how much worse it would have been if the boys had eaten one of those sugary monstrosities they called ‘snacks’.

As he put on socks Thorin noticed Frodo sitting on a chair near the balcony and looking down morosely at his piece of cake, looking a little sad and miserable.

Thorin licked his lips and got up, making his way towards the boy, he asked, “Frodo, are you okay?” 

Frodo jumped slightly and quickly raised his head, startled. “Oh, I-” He cut himself off and picked at his lip anxiously. 

“It’s okay Frodo, you can tell me, but only if you want to.” Thorin offered, pulling another chair and sitting down by his side.

In the months that had passed since they had met, Thorin had grown close to the boy and quickly grown attached to him. Thorin had always liked children and Frodo was no exception. 

The lad was calm and sweet but he had a curious mind that wanted to learn and see as much as he could, it reminded Thorin of himself when he was younger. Thorin had gotten used to his moods, being them bad or good, and after their trip to buy Bilbo’s Christmas gift Thorin could say they had grown even closer. 

Frodo was in his life nearly as much as his nephews and Thorin had come to care about him more and more as each day passed. Thorin was beginning to think it was simply impossible to not love him and his uncle. 

“I want to tell someone something really important but I’m worried they won’t be happy about it,” Frodo said, eyes downcast, his lip wobbling faintly. 

Thorin blinked wondering what Frodo might be talking about. Would it be to one of his nephews, perhaps they had done something to upset him… 

No, Frodo wouldn’t have hesitated to tell them. It had to be something else.

“Well, I’m sure if that person cares about you they will, at least, listen to you,” Thorin said, putting his hand on the boy’s shoulder. “You can’t control how other people feel, but if what you have to say is important and think it needs to be heard then you should go for it.”

“But- But-” Frodo stammered, a worried frown on his face. “What if what I tell them upsets them?” 

“Is it something bad that you want to tell them?” Asked Thorin, trying to understand the situation better without prying too much.

“I don’t think so. I wanna tell them how special they are to me but what if they don’t feel the same?”

Ah, Thorin realized, this was about Bilbo.

It could, of course, have easily been a first love woe but Thorin doubted that was the case. Frodo looked far too serious and upset and the one who could make him look like that was Bilbo.

“I’m sure that if what you have to say comes from your heart then it’ll be fine. I’m sure he loves you just as much, Frodo.” Thorin reassured and gave the boy a meaningful glance.

Frodo’s eyes widened slightly and Thorin cheered the fact that the boy had caught his meaning. “Really?”

“Really,” Thorin assured with a nod. 

And he knew it was true. Bilbo would throw himself over a cliff before hurting Frodo, he loved the boy like his very own despite haven’t been that very long since his adoption. Thorin had heard about all the things Bilbo had done and all the books he had read and parenting classes he had signed up in for Frodo. 

Whatever the lad had to tell him Thorin was sure it would be returned tenfold.

“Okay,” Frodo said, a trembling smile on his face. “Thank you,” he added, throwing himself against Thorin’s side and hugging him. “I’m really happy we got to meet you.” 

Thorin patted Frodo on the head and returned the hug. “I’m happy we got to meet as well, and you’re very welcome.” He drew back and added, “if you want to talk or need any sort of advice — or anything really — you know you can come to me, right?”

Frodo gave him a toothy smile and said, “yeah, I know!”

“Good,” Thorin said, ruffling his hair and making him giggle.

At that moment Bilbo got out of the bathroom, only wearing a pair of pants and no t-shirt. 

Thorin blinked rapidly, astonished, as he followed Bilbo with his eyes. He bit his lip strong enough to hurt and hoped his face looked normal and didn’t show what Thorin was feeling inside. 

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath opening them again to find Bilbo looking rummaging around the room.

“Has anyone seen my t-shirt?” He asked.

“The black one?” Frodo asked, putting down his bread and climbing down from the chair, walking towards Bilbo to help him in his search.

“Yes, the very same.”

Thorin was also about to get up and help in the search when Fíli gasped, drawing the attention of everyone to him.

“Your back!” Fíli exclaimed, pointing at Bilbo. “It looks like stars!”

His brother, who had been looking almost dumbly at the TV until he had gasped shouted, “Really? Show me! I wanna see!” He scrambled off the bed and hurried towards Bilbo, turning around him to see his back. 

Thorin, more calmly, did the same, and true enough Bilbo’s shoulders, upper arms and down to his middle back he was littered with freckles, a pretty light shade of brown that almost matched his hair.

“It’s true! So pretty! Are those moles? They don’t look like moles” Kíli rambled excitedly.

“Oh, those are freckles! Uncle has lots of them.” Frodo explained proudly.

“Can I count them?” Kíli asked. “There are lots of them.”

Bilbo laughed and reluctantly said, “I don’t think-”

“Please!” Kíli begged and soon Fíli joined with even Frodo looking interested at the idea.

Bilbo huffed amused, smiling indulgently at the kids. “Okay, sure. Count away!” He said rolling his eyes and sitting down on the last spare bed.

“Uncle come help us! There’s too many.” Kíli said, brushing a fingertip on top of the freckles, an awed look on his face. “Hurry!” He demanded when Thorin didn’t move, too busy looking at the three children huddled together against Bilbo’s back.

“Aye, aye. I’m going.” Thorin answered and sat down on the empty spot beside Bilbo, craning his neck sideways to look at the freckles. “I’ll count this arm and shoulder,” Thorin announced.

Bilbo caught his gaze and they both shared amused smiles at the children’s antics. 

Thorin brushed the tip of his finger against the freckles, counting them, and trying to see if he could actually spot any constellations there. 

“Did you boys know that some people say that freckles are where angels have kissed you?” Thorin commented as he finished counting, slightly disappointed at not being able to recognize any constellations.

“What does that mean?” Kíli asked, scrunching his face in confusion. “Have you let more people kiss you, Bilbo? I suppose it’s alright if you get freckles out of it but you shouldn’t do it too often, you should only let us three and uncle kiss you.” Kíli nodded to himself before adding, “we’ll give you all the freckles you want.”

Thorin guffawed while Bilbo sputtered as he turned red, by his side.

“I think it’s just a saying Kee.” Said Fíli, but still eyed the freckles as if that way he could confirm that no angels had any hand in making them appear.

“Oh.” Said Kíli. “Well, still. We can give you all the kisses you want, Bilbo. Right, uncle?” He asked Thorin. 

Thorin hummed in agreement and after meeting Bilbo’s gaze he pointedly kissed his shoulder, smothering a smile against it when Bilbo’s eyes widened slightly. Right after, he blushed as he smiled prettily at Thorin.

The children followed soon after and Thorin watched with a fond smile as they peppered Bilbo with sloppy pecks and the man laughed at their silliness, giving them kisses back.

Yeah, Thorin didn’t mind waiting for Bilbo for whatever time he needed as long as he got to have these little moments with him.

  
  


**Day 99**

Frodo fastened his boots and tucked his pants underneath them, making sure no snow would get inside.

They had woken up late — after sleeping so late — and had almost missed breakfast at the cafeteria of the hotel.

Frodo looked up to where Bilbo and Thorin were bickering and laughing together and wondered if Bilbo would tell him about his feelings soon.

He hadn’t meant to, Kee, Fee and he had decided it was better not to meddle but Frodo hadn’t been able to stop himself. His uncle looked like he didn’t have a clue about what was going on and Frodo just had wanted to help, and maybe also confirm if Bilbo also loved Thorin.

Thankfully all had gone well and it seemed Bilbo had taken Frodo’s words seriously. Just like he always did.

Which reminded Frodo of his conversation with Thorin the day before.

He had assured Frodo it would be fine, even if Frodo hadn’t explained the whole situation. And he believed him! He really did, but that didn’t make the anxiety and worry disappear.

Frodo hated feeling like that, it made him feel miserable and sad.

He still didn’t know when he would talk to Bilbo about it yet, but he thought it would be before they went back home. Frodo wasn’t sure if he would be brave enough to do it later.

“Frodo! Are you ready?” Asked Fíli, running towards him.

Frodo looked up from where he was finishing tying up his boots and saw everyone waiting for him.

“Yes! I’m ready.” He said, running towards the door.

They were going to visit the resort and see what activities they would do. Fíli had wanted to make snowmen and Frodo wanted to try sledging and the attractions of the park. The resort was huge and Frodo wanted to try everything. Kíli had wanted to go skiing but Thorin had explained that it would be better if they let that for the next day since they had woken up so late.

“I want to ride the snow tubes!” Kíli shouted as he pointed to the poster that was at the entrance of the snow attractions.

Frodo looked at the picture of the poster, a few children riding in the snow tubes and sledging down a great snow hill.

It looked amazing.

“I wanna go too!” Said Frodo. Fíli shouted his agreement not a second later.

“Alright, alright!” Thorin said, both of his hands in front of him in a placating manner.

They quickly made their way there, they had to show their entrance badges to the woman at the entrance of the snow rink but after that, they were led to the snow tubes. To Frodo’s delight, the park wasn’t as crowded as he had thought it would be. It meant they could climb as many times as they wanted on the attractions and not wait too long on the queues.

Once his turn arrived Frodo wasn’t so sure anymore. Bilbo had slid down first and his scream had been a bit terrifying.

“I don’t know if I want to do this anymore,” Frodo said, turning to look at Thorin. “That sounded really scary.” Frodo pointed to where the faint sounds of Bilbo’s screams could still be heard.

“It’ll be okay. We can go together if you want.” Thorin reassured him.

In the beginning, they had agreed that Bilbo would go first and wait for them down there and then Thorin would go last to help the other ones up before they slid down.

Frodo thought about it, he really didn’t want to go alone but if Thorin was there then it should be okay, right?

“Okay,” Frodo relented. “But you have to hold me really tight, I don’t wanna fall.”

“Very well. Kíli, Fíli go you two first.” Thorin said, pushing them in front of Frodo.

They had wanted to go alone but then Frodo noticed how neither protested Thorin’s order. They were looking at the slope wearily, and Frodo couldn’t fault them. It was like those of the rollercoasters and unlike on those, they would only go down on a plastic thing shaped like a floater.

Frodo took Thorin’s hand, anxiously watching as the brothers climbed together, Kíli on the front and Fíli beside him. Both were clutching tight at the handles of the snow tube. Kíli was scrunching his face as he squinted his eyes — looking like he wanted to close them but was holding himself from actually doing it. Fíli was taking deep breaths.

Overall just watching them was making Frodo even more nervous. He bit his lip and watched as one of the staff assistants in charge of the attraction put them in position.

“Ready boys?” He asked.

Hesitantly they nodded and Frodo watched helplessly as they slid down and almost jumped when the first scream — Fíli’s — reached them.

“OH MY GOD!” He shouted.

Kíli followed soon after and Frodo nervously giggled when he heard him scream, “HOLY COCONUTS!”

Since they weren’t allowed to swear, Kíli had decided to find a loop on it and use normal words but say them as if they were swears. His mother wasn't too happy about it but she didn’t complain too much since what Kíli said wasn’t really a bad word. ‘Holy coconuts’ was his favourite.

Frodo found it extremely funny, and even in his nervousness, it made him laugh.

Thorin guffawed beside him, and Frodo smiled at him.

They saw as the brothers made their way to the end then faintly heard Kíli whoop.

Frodo let out a sigh of relief. That meant it wasn’t so bad, they weren’t crying and Frodo was pretty sure they were laughing now.

It was fine, it would be fun. He had Thorin with him. Thorin was big and strong, it would be alright.

Frodo kept reaping those words in his mind like a mantra as they climbed on the snow tube, one of Thorin’s arms looped around him. Frodo made sure to not look at the slide in front of him, instead, focusing on looking at the snow tube and its ugly mustard colour.

They got asked if they were ready and after a stiff nod from him, Thorin answered yes.

Frodo swallowed thickly and looked up.

Oh no-

_Holy coconuts..._

The slope looked even more daunting than before, he could barely make out the shapes of Bilbo and his friends at the end.

“I-” Frodo started shaking his head. “Thorin I don’t think-”

Frodo cut himself off as they suddenly were pushed, he gripped tight around the handles, absently feeling Thorin’s hold on him tighten.

He let out a scream, half garbled as if it had been torn out from him.

Midway his scream was cut off, as he ran out of air. Frodo took a deep breath as they kept falling, his stomach on his throat and Thorin’s laughter on his ear.

They hit a bump on the snow and the snow tube jumped, making them hover in the air for a half a second. Frodo let out a startled laugh.

This wasn’t so bad, he thought, as they hit more bumps and the end came closer. At one point Frodo even dared to lift his arms as he had seen some other people do, whooping as he felt the wind and the snow on his face.

It almost felt like flying with how fast they were going.

They reached the end and Frodo got up with a shout, running towards Bilbo, who looked a little pale now that Frodo noticed.

“That wasn't so bad, was it?” Asked Thorin from behind.

“It was amazing!” Frodo shouted, jumping up and down.

“I know, right?!” Fíli cheered. “Let’s go again!”

Frodo and Kíli screamed their agreements while Bilbo shook his head, his eyes wide.

“I think I’m going to stay here, you lads go have fun.” He said.

Frodo frowned at that, looking worried at his uncle.

“But you’re gonna get all bored there,” Kíli said disgruntled.

“My heart almost left my body on that slope and for a moment I didn’t even touch that plastic float thingy or the ground for that matter. I don’t think I’m too keen on repeating the experience.” He explained.

“Just one last time,” Thorin said. “I’ll go with you. Frodo can attest I’m great company.”

Frodo nodded. “Thorin will keep you safe, he hugged me the whole way down.”

“I- I don’t know,” Bilbo said unsure. “Besides that would mean leaving the boys alone at some point and I’m not so sure about that.”

“We’ll be okay! You and uncle go first and wait for us here and I’ll go last since I’m the oldest, I’ll look after Kee and Frodo.” Fíli suddenly said, puffing his chest like Frodo had seen All Might do on TV.

"See? It'll be fine." Said Thorin, trying to convince him.

But Bilbo still looked dubious so Frodo decided to intervene. He put on his best puppy eyes, and pleaded, "just one last time uncle!"

Bilbo still looked reluctant but he let out a sigh of defeat and Frodo cheered inwardly.

“Alright then,” Bilbo said and Frodo didn’t miss the way he reached out to hold Thorin’s hand.

He elbowed Fíli and Kíli and pointed at their hands, the three of them hid delighted giggles behind their scarfs.

It wasn't odd seeing them hold hands but they still enjoyed watching them do it. In fact, it happened so often that many times they had been mistaken as a married couple with Frodo, Kíli and Fíli as their children.

It was nice, Frodo didn’t mind. He would be lucky to have Thorin and his friends as his family. They were great people and Frodo loved them very much.

Frodo smiled again as he saw them get ready to slide again. Thorin was firmly holding Bilbo while he gripped the handle on a death hold, meanwhile, Bilbo was hiding his face on Thorin’s neck as the man chuckled and assured him it would be alright.

He felt all warm and happy just from watching it and he didn’t doubt that if he felt like that, then Bilbo and Thorin must be feeling even happier.

It would be okay then, Frodo thought. It didn’t matter if they took a long time before they started dating, Frodo didn’t need them to do that to know they already loved each other.

  
  


* * *

  
  


Frodo swallowed thickly, glancing back at Bilbo shyly, he asked, “Uncle?”

They had gone back to the hotel late in the evening, absolutely exhausted after had finished making a whole family of snowmen — just like Fíli had wanted.

“Hm?” Bilbo answered absently from where he was behind Frodo, brushing his hair. Wearing the helmet for the snow tube had left Frodo with horrible knots that had only gotten worse when he had showered.

Thorin had offered to go buy a detangler spray for him and had taken Fíli and Kíli with him, giving Frodo an encouraging smile and a thumbs up before leaving.

It was okay, now was a good moment.

Frodo took a deep breath and tentatively asked, “You- you know I love you, right?”

Bilbo stopped his movements and turned slightly to the side to look better at Frodo and meet their eyes. “What- Of course. I- Of course I know that, little duck. What brought this on?” He asked.

Frodo took a deep breath. It was now or never…

“I’m really happy it was you the one to adopt me after mom and daddy died. You make me really happy and you love me lots and- and-” Frodo stuttered as his vision blurred, big tears starting to fall from his eyes.

No, no. He wasn’t supposed to cry now.

Frodo felt Bilbo tense beside him and heard him sigh before a pair of arms wrapped around him. Frodo turned and buried his face on Bilbo’s chest, taking a deep breath, the scent of cinnamon and honey coming from Bilbo, calming him.

“I’m glad I adopted you as well, Frodo. You make me very happy too.” Bilbo said patting Frodo’s hair with one hand, while he still held Frodo close with the other. “Now,” he said, drawing away enough to look at Frodo, “will you tell me what brought this on?”

“Well,” Frodo began hesitantly, looking down at his hands as he fidgeted with them, “I have been thinking and I-” Frodo took a deep breath, looking up and almost shouted, “Can I call you papa?!”

Bilbo’s eyes widened in shock and he opened his mouth but he didn’t say anything.

Frodo panicked.

“It’s not- I’m not trying to replace daddy! I’m not!” Frodo shouted. “Daddy is daddy and he always will be, but I think I want you to be my papa as well. You already figure on the papers as my dad so it’s okay right? I just-" Frodo hesitated before adding quietly, "I just want you to be more than my uncle...”

He had thought about asking Bilbo for a while now, never managing to gather the courage to do it. He had even talked about it with his therapist and after listening to Frodo she had agreed it would be a good idea to tell Bilbo.

He really wasn't trying to replace his daddy but calling Bilbo ‘papa’ felt more natural than calling him ‘uncle’. Since Frodo had realised that’s what he wanted to call Bilbo he had had to stop himself a few times from actually saying it.

“Oh, Frodo,” Bilbo said, pulling Frodo into another hug, tighter and warmer than the one before. Frodo heard him sniffing as he said, “of course you can call me ‘papa’. That would actually make me really happy.”

Frodo felt more tears gather in his eyes as a splitting, trembling, smile overtook his face.

Bilbo drew away and kissed Frodo on the forehead. “I also consider you something more than my nephew, you’re very special to me, Frodo. I know it’s only been a couple of years since you have been living with me but I love you very much and I'm very lucky to have you in my life. Be it as my nephew or my son.” Bilbo said, smiling as tears fell down his face and suddenly Frodo couldn't contain it anymore, he burst out sobbing.

Frodo felt an inexplicable warmth lit him from the inside. He was so lucky to have Bilbo in his life.

  
  


When Thorin and his two friends came back they found them, still on the bed softly crying as they talked, cuddling tightly together. They had quickly joined the hug as Frodo explained to them what had happened. Thorin had met his gaze and had grinned him at him mouthing a ‘well done’ before anyone else noticed. He was also very lucky to have Thorin, Frodo thought.

And as the five of them watched the stars from the balcony, Frodo wistfully wondered if his parents were there, high in the sky among the stars. He liked to think that was the case and that from up there, they were smiling at him and Bilbo, happy that Frodo had found a family.

  
  


**Day 100**

Bilbo felt on cloud nine.

He had complained at first but this vacation was the best Bilbo had ever had.

Frodo’s confession the day before had been very surprising but not unwelcome in the slightest. Just thinking about it made Bilbo feel all warm inside.

He still could remember the day he had realized he loved Frodo as his own son, it had been a dreary day, the sky grey and the smell of petrichor permeating the air. Frodo had gotten into a fight when one of his classmates had mocked him for not having parents after Frodo had talked about his family in front of the class.

Bilbo couldn’t remember ever having been angrier in his life. 

In the end, the situation overall had been handled very poorly by both the school and the parents of the nasty girl that had taunted Frodo. Bilbo had quickly changed him to another school when his teacher had refused to punish the girl and simply dismissed it as ‘harmless children’s play’ saying she just didn’t know any better, meanwhile Frodo was about to face suspension for pushing the girl to the ground, never mind the bites he had on his arms when she had retaliated. 

It had been an awful day where there had been many tears, but things had gotten better after that. Frodo was starting to get better with his schoolmates and no one had ever bullied him for his situation, his teacher being very understanding and caring.

It had been that day, as Bilbo put bruising cream on the bites and hugged Frodo as he cried on his lap that Bilbo realized he would do absolutely anything to make Frodo happy. 

_Ah_ , he had thought, _this must be what parents felt for their children_.

Of course not in his wildest dream he had ever hoped to have the sentiment returned. 

Frodo had adored his parents and their loss had hit him hard, naturally, he was aware that Frodo loved him, but he had never thought for a moment that it would equal what he felt for his parents. And Bilbo was okay with that, he didn’t need it, being part of Frodo’s life was enough.

So finding out Frodo loved him enough to want to call him ‘papa’ had been a surprise, a very staggering one, but still a surprise.

Bilbo had never expected to find such happiness. He had discarded the idea of having children of his own a long time ago, never really having felt ready to have such a long life commitment.

Of course, he sometimes had longed for that sort of affection, after watching a father with their child, but it quickly passed and never lingered enough to do something about it.

Then Frodo had arrived in his life, amid a tragedy and despite all his doubts, Bilbo _couldn’t_ not take him. If there was a child he would ever love so much that he would commit himself to take care of them and loving until his very last breath, that would be Frodo.

Fíli and Kíli had been a nice addition. They were nice boys, rambunctious and loud but very bright, both in mind and heart. 

And Bilbo really had to start questioning if what said about not being good with children, or not liking them so much, was true anymore, because every day he had passed with Frodo and his friends had been amazing and Bilbo cherished them all.

So all in all, Bilbo was extremely happy and ready to face another day in the unforgiving snow. They had one more day before they had to leave and currently were on their way to the ski slopes.

The boys were determined to learn and Thorin being able to handle pretty well on the snowboard was just as excited to go. Bilbo, for his part, felt slightly dubious. So far all his experiences with winter sports had been less than fun. Even with Thorin holding him during the snow tube sliding the day before, Bilbo had screamed his lungs out in terror. It hadn’t been as bad as the first time when he had gone alone and almost toppled midway, but it hadn’t been fun either.

Either way, it couldn't be worse than ice skating. Bilbo was certain nothing could be worse than that.

  
  


Once they had put on the skis and had actually started to try and ski, Bilbo had to question his past statement.

He wasn’t so sure anymore. Maybe- Maybe winter sports just weren’t made for him!

Yes, that had to be it, Bilbo wouldn't accept any other explanation.

Bilbo rather preferred swimming or climbing, all perfectly safe and easy sports — no matter how much Thorin tried to argue against that.

It had to be that because otherwise, Bilbo didn’t understand why he had face-planted on the snow and almost bruised an ankle when he had tried to slide less the distance of a measly step.

For the part, the boys had taken it like fish to the water. Fíli had been the one to have more trouble and still had managed to make himself slide and stop at will without falling face first.

It wasn’t fair. 

Not at all.

Bilbo just wanted to have fun, not end up full of bruises and aches like the one time they had gone ice skating.

He said Thorin as much, grumbling and complaining to him for agreeing to come to the death trap that was ice and snow.

“I’m certain the snow doesn't have it for you, Bilbo,” Had been Thorin's amused answer.

The sod...

“Then how do you explain all the fright and injuries it has caused me? My left side still sore after I jammed it against the handle of the snow tube yesterday. I wonder why- Oh! Yes! Because I almost went flying and broke my neck!” Alright, so maybe it hadn’t been as bad and Bilbo was dramatising a little but still, it had been awful and his point still stood. 

Snow was evil and Bilbo was in hell.

“Then how about the other day we made snowmen, hm? You didn’t hurt yourself that time.” 

Bilbo snorted, giving Thorin a condescending look. “If that had happened then I would be saying that I have been cursed or haunted and would be calling an exorcist, not simply complaining that the snow hates me.”

Thorin cackled at that and Bilbo gave him the stinky eye, kicking some snow to him, and almost falling again.

“Alright, alright.” Thorin surrendered. “How about we try snowboarding? I have experience and I could help you. I won’t let you fall, promise.”

Bilbo thought about it for a moment, pondering the pros and the cons of it before reluctantly nodding. 

The boys had gone to a bigger slope were practising sliding down, close to where Thorin and Bilbo were. Bilbo smiled when he saw Frodo pass, his face flushed and a big smile on his face. He had to take some photos, these would be worth adding to their album.

Thorin adjusted the snowboard on his feet and with his help, Bilbo slowly got up, almost falling to the ground as he began to slide without meaning to. Thorin quickly grabbed him by the hips and Bilbo held onto his shoulder in a death grip.

“It’s alright, I got you. Now try to stand straight and bend your knees a little.” Thorin instructed.

Bilbo did as told reluctantly, Thorin’s hand on his hips making him feel safe.

He felt as Thorin shifted behind him and pressed his body flush against Bilbo. Thorin’s knees pressed against the back of Bilbo’s and forced him to bend lower.

Bilbo felt his face heat instantly, the feeling almost painful with how cold he had been not a moment before. He shook his head. Now it wasn’t the time to think about those things, never mind Thorin was very tall and strong and despite the winter wear Bilbo could feel it keenly against him.

Bilbo swallowed thickly. Usually, he was perfectly fine with being close to Thorin but there were times, not many, but still enough to be a problem, when Bilbo just couldn’t stop himself from _noticing_ Thorin, in ways he usually didn’t and finding himself _wanting_.

It was very embarrassing. 

“That’s the main position you want to be in. Now, to stop, if you’re going straight you simply need to dig your heels into the snow, do it slowly so you don’t stop abruptly and fall.” Thorin explained. 

Bilbo tried digging his heels into the snow, and sure enough, that was pretty easy.

“It’s easier than with the skis,” Bilbo said, feeling more animated.

“Why don’t you try sliding down a bit, I’ll be behind you,” Thorin suggested.

“Okay,” Bilbo said. It seemed pretty easy and the slope wasn’t very steep, besides the distance ought to do him good. He was starting to feel a little faint with having Thorin so close.

He let himself slide, digging his heels every now and then and advancing down the slope at a turtle pace, Thorin walking just one step beside him.

They reached the bottom and Bilbo cheered, happy to have made the entire way down without falling once. He turned around sharply to look at Thorin, shouting, “did you see?! I made i-” Suddenly Bilbo toppled over and Thorin rushed towards him, catching him in his arms.

“I saw it! You did amazingly!” Thorin cheered, looking down at Bilbo, a blinding smile on his face.

Bilbo looked at his face, flushed from the cold, and then met his eyes, deep blue, so full of life and _love_ \- 

He was beautiful.

Before he noticed he was leaning in and Thorin had frozen on the spot, his smile dimming, and the next thing he knew was that he was closing his eyes as he pressed his lips softly against Thorin’s in a chaste kiss. 

He felt chapped lips against his own, Thorin's beard scratching against his cheeks and Bilbo's heart _soared_.

Bilbo drew back, slightly dazed, but before he could go too far a pair of hands had grabbed him but the cheeks, and Thorin was pulling him in a deeper kiss, almost desperate. 

Bilbo leaned deeper, humming into the kiss and grabbing into Thorin’s coat, as he tasted mint, coffee and something that could only be _Thorin._

“I love you,” Bilbo whispered against his lips and Thorin made a desperate sound, opening his eyes and looking at Bilbo, their forehead still pressed together. “I love you so much.”

Thorin smiled and laughed a little breathlessly. His eyes looked incredibly bright and Bilbo couldn’t stop himself and pulled him into another kiss, Thorin quickly responding.

Thorin angled his head to the side, pressing his tongue against Bilbo’s lips and Bilbo felt his beard scratch his nose, giggling at the sensation.

He drew back slightly, Thorin following after him pressing small kisses against his mouth. Bilbo hugged him by the waist, pulling him closer and as he was about to lean in again for another full kiss when he heard children cheering in the distance.

They separated quickly and Bilbo licked his lips looking behind Thorin to find the boys skiing towards them while they cheered and whooped, drawing the attention of everyone around them.

“Finally!” Cheered Fíli.

“I’m so happy you finally did it, Papa!” Shouted Frodo, almost falling to the ground in his hassle to reach them.

Bilbo laughed, his face most likely looking beet red with how hot Bilbo felt. 

“Bagsy being the one to carry the rings when you get married!” Shouted suddenly Kíli.

“Ah! That’s cheating, I want to carry the rings too!” Frodo complained.

“I’ll be the one to do it since I’m the oldest!” Fíli exclaimed, puffing his chest.

Bilbo laughed again as he saw the boys arguing, Thorin chuckled against him.

“I suppose that explaining to them that we’re not getting married just yet, won’t do anything,” Thorin commented, amused.

Bilbo felt his heart leap. 

Thorin hadn’t said they weren’t going to get married, he had just said ‘not yet’.

It was silly. Bilbo had no plans getting married any time soon, they had barely acknowledged their feelings, for goodness sake! But it was still nice to know Thorin hadn’t dismissed the possibility.

“I suppose not,” Bilbo answered with another laugh.

After the boys had calmed they managed to convince Bilbo to slide a bigger slope with them, Thorin quickly going to exchange Bilbo's skis for another snowboard.

He fell a couple of times but it wasn’t nearly as painful or embarrassing as with the skis so Bilbo didn’t mind.

The rest of the day passed in a flurry between lunch and after a particularly vicious snowball fight — where naturally Fíli and he had won — they arrived back at the hotel, the children barely awake.

He smiled and made a mental note to thank Dís. If she hadn’t insisted Bilbo wasn’t sure how long it would have taken him to gather the courage to tell Thorin his feelings. 

Bilbo still didn’t know what it had been that had made him and Thorin cross paths but he knew that the children were the reason he and Thorin were now together, and Bilbo would never be able to thank them enough for that.

  
  


* * *

  
  


Later in the night, once the children were asleep. Thorin and Bilbo sat on the bench of the balcony cuddled together, a blanket around them to protect them from the cold.

They watched the stars, being so close to the mountain Bilbo could see stars he had never seen before. Bilbo tried to stop any well-known constellations, getting frustrated as he couldn’t find any. He was about to turn to complain to Thorin when the arms around his waist tightened and Bilbo felt his being pressed into his neck.

Bilbo’s breath stuttered as he felt little kisses being pressed against his skin.

“I love you too,” Thorin said and Bilbo’s heart stopped beating for a moment. “I really do.”

Bilbo bit his lip, feeling a smile pull at the corner of his lips. He chortled quietly, almost giggling.

Turning his face he searched Thorin’s lips with his own and pressed a kiss against them, humming happily when Thorin deepened it.

The way had been hard and Thorin and he had gone through many things before finding each other, but this felt — in a strange way — like the way of the universe apologizing to them. 

It was unbelievable that it had only taken a chance meeting to get this much happiness.

He didn't even dare to think what his life would have been if they had never met. A little dimmer, surely.

Bilbo didn't know how or why had it happened but he thanked whatever force of the universe had been responsible for bringing them all together. Bilbo couldn’t wait to see what the rest of the road had ahead of him, as with Thorin and the children at his side, every day felt a little brighter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was a joy to write this for you, Navy!  
> I hope you have enjoyed it and that - with this fic - I was able to give you as much love and joy as you give me every single day!! 😘💖🥰


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